Have you ever been in a situation in which you are surrounded by complete strangers and are not exactly sure what the outcome will be? This past week I was lucky enough to attend Trailhead Academy at Appalachian State University. This academy focuses on bettering leadership skills, forming life-long friendships, becoming informed of the campus and the Boone community, and gaining a deeper knowledge for oneself. Out of this leadership academy, I feel that I accomplished all of these items, though they are always able to be worked upon. Becoming informed and aware was a true blessing, but what really created an impact on me were the friends I made along the way.
While driving back down the mountain, I questioned myself: How could I have possibly formed such strong relationships with 32 people in a matter of four days? Then, I realized a few of the following:
1.I was myself, and only that.
When thrown into a large group of people whom I have never met or seen before, I am typically calm and laid back in order to seem like a "cool" person. I think this is common, for people want to present themselves to be impressive. Do not be common and do not present yourself as anything other than you. Before arriving, I simply told myself "to heck with that" and decided to be who I am- the sarcastic, a little crazy, funny (at least I think so), caring person that I believe I have become. What came out of this decision was amazing. I connected with people instantly and laughed continuously with them for the rest of our time there.
2. Go out and do something different.
Sure, grabbing lunch or coffee with a friend is fun and so is Netflix, but think about how boring that eventually becomes. During my time at Trailhead, we went river tubing, hiked, volunteered in the community, and even explored the farmers market. By participating in activities that gave the opportunity of bonding with one another, that is exactly what we did. Yes, we were at a "camp," and were given these activities to do, but these opportunities are out there for everyone. Go out and enjoy them.
3. Keep an open mind.
The decision to have a completely open mind truly did allow me to grow as a person and become close to the majority of everyone I had the pleasure to spend time with. Some of the topics we discussed during the four days were heavy and brought forth strong opinions. Instead of judging an opinion or instantly comparing it to my own, I processed it and thought it through. It is amazing how much more you care for someone and their own beliefs when you understand their own story. I still hold on to my own thoughts and opinions, but the fact that I listened to others and what they thought allowed for strong relationships to form. Some of the things stated made me truly think through and process topics discussed. It is interesting and extremely helpful if you go into situations with an open mind and caring heart.
4. Spend time wisely.
At Trailhead, we had four days together. That is a total of 96 hours- which sounds like a lot of time. It's not nearly enough time, I promise. What amazed me was that I checked my phone twice a day, maybe. No one really spent a large amount of time looking at a phone screen and posting on social media. What happens when you put the devices down and actually talk to one another can be surprising. Please know that you will form a better bond with someone when you look them in the eyes and talk rather than looking at their social media profile. The 32 of us were never absent, either. No one was locked away in their room or refusing to participate in an activity. We wanted to spend our time wisely, and so we did. Making friends is easier than most think- you just have to put in the effort and be aware of what you are doing to form those relationships.
5. Care.
It really is as simple as that. Care for everyone you spend time with. Do not assume that they know you care, either. Talk to people, get to know them, listen to their story, and care about them. I know I did not think I would come out of Trailhead caring for 32 different people, but I do. Each and every one of them. And I am sure that they all know it. It may be a bit of cliché to mention, but life is short, and we should make the most of it while we can. We like knowing that people care about us, right? It feels good to be cared for, therefore, we should share that with others. Who are we to not spread what caring is?
It has been over a week since I have returned from Trailhead, and if you asked me if I would go back right this second, I would. There is something about the people that make a difference. I know I would have had a great time no matter who I was with, but these people made it special. If you are one of those 32 wonderful, funny, bright, caring, and lovable people- thank you.
"Take wrong turns. Talk to strangers. Open unmarked doors. And if you see a group of people in a field, go find out what they are doing. Do things without always knowing how they'll turn out. You're curious and smart and bored...remember that you are always making up the future as you go." - Randall Munroe