High school is always a tough battle of figuring out who you are while also trying to keep the acceptance and approval of your peers.
It's crazy how one person can come into your life and change everything, including the way you view others. Learning to let go of the "cookie cutter" image society holds on the way relationships should be in high school, in college, and in general, was the best thing for so many reasons.
1. I learned to stop caring what others had to say about my relationship.
Back when I was in high school I admit the approval of my peers meant a lot to me. I cared what others had to say about me-their opinion was often a deal breaker when it came to the decisions I made, the people I hung out with, and the guys I dated.
This all changed when I fell in love with my current boyfriend –– who is 6 years older than me –– and when I chose to make the relationship public.
My high school was not the most “diverse and accepting” school out there (I mean how many high schools are), and my relationship quickly became the topic of discussion in group chats and gossip circles. To be fair my boyfriend was getting up and going to work, while guys my age were playing beer pong at house parties- it was different.
I quickly realized that this time around the things people-including close friends of mine-said about my relationship didn’t actually bother me. This was because I was genuinely happy and in love with an amazing man- and I didn’t have to justify that happiness to the people who only wanted to talk about how different and weird it was.
The way I felt about my relationship was incomparable to anything else, and the opinions of others could not change that. Not everyone will understand/approve of your relationship and guess what- it's not the end of the world.
2. I learned to stop judging others.
We were all taught the basic lessons in Kindergarten, “Don’t judge a book by its cover” and "Don’t judge a person until you walk a mile in his/her shoes,” but I agree it is human nature to notice the things that are out of the ordinary or different.
I know I was guilty of judging others, even if it was only in my head. But after being judged and gossiped about by people who didn’t even try to understand my situation, my attitude drastically changed. I found myself defending those who were subjects of gossip and rumors, as I had gained a better understanding of what it's like to be misunderstood.
3. I learned how to be genuinely happy.
We often don't realize that we let the fear of others' opinions control our decisions; it's just something our brain naturally tends to do. But when you're surrounding yourself with the things you truly love, you realize that nothing else matters. I'm not saying my happiness was based on a guy what so ever.
Happiness comes from within.
I am a strong believer that you must love yourself before you are capable of loving someone else, but letting go of what others think can change so much. At the end of the day, I have an amazing relationship with the man of my dreams and I am happier being who I truly am, which is all that truly matters.
As the wise Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway."
