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25 Reasons Wine Is More Reliable Than A Man

Someone had to say it.

Emily Schroeder

Jan 02, 2017

Peru State College

25 Reasons Wine Is More Reliable Than A Man

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Let me just start by saying this, in the course of my short 22 years I have learned many things. Some good, some ... not so much. But one thing I have come to know with a full sense of confidence is this: You will always find something more reliable than a man. With that being said, I do have to confess that this is with the exception of my father whom, on more than one occasion, has received a sobbing phone call about my recent vehicular mishap with the utmost sense of calm I have yet to match. So when I really spread my wings, you could say, I only found one thing closer to my heart. Wine. Yeah I said it. Sorry to folks out there who cannot attain similar feels this vibrant, versatile and oh so sophisticated liquid.

1. Wine will always cheer you up.

2. It will never ask you to send nudes!

3. Wine will never comment on your weight!

4. Not only that, but it can help keep you slimmer!

5. Wine helps you live longer.

6. It helps you cook.

7. Will always love the outfit you put it in.

8. It will always help you unwind after a bad day.

9. It's always the life of the party!

10. You'll (almost) never feel bad about sharing it!

11. Never leaves you lonely.

12. Helps you forget about anything!

13. It can only get better with age!

14. Contributes to any cute DIY craft.

15. Reduces your risk of heart disease!

16. AND increases your brain function.

17. Inspires fabulous bravery.

18. It will never take you on a bad date!

19. You never have to feel embarrassed about taking it anywhere!

20. It will never shame you for staying in bed all day!

21. It doesn't have a political opinion.

22. Never talks back.

23. Never have to deal with the stress of meeting its family...unless you mean its hotter redder brother ;)

24. Laughs at ALL of your jokes!

25. Will basically never let you down.

So I say CHEERS! To fermented fruit and reliability!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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25 Reasons Wine Is More Reliable Than A Man

Someone had to say it.

1. Wine will always cheer you up.

2. It will never ask you to send nudes!

3. Wine will never comment on your weight!

4. Not only that, but it can help keep you slimmer!

5. Wine helps you live longer.

6. It helps you cook.

7. Will always love the outfit you put it in.

8. It will always help you unwind after a bad day.

9. It's always the life of the party!

10. You'll (almost) never feel bad about sharing it!

11. Never leaves you lonely.

12. Helps you forget about anything!

13. It can only get better with age!

14. Contributes to any cute DIY craft.

15. Reduces your risk of heart disease!

16. AND increases your brain function.

17. Inspires fabulous bravery.

18. It will never take you on a bad date!

19. You never have to feel embarrassed about taking it anywhere!

20. It will never shame you for staying in bed all day!

21. It doesn't have a political opinion.

22. Never talks back.

23. Never have to deal with the stress of meeting its family...unless you mean its hotter redder brother ;)

24. Laughs at ALL of your jokes!

25. Will basically never let you down.

So I say CHEERS! To fermented fruit and reliability!

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

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