20 Things To Do In Your 20s Instead Of Looking For Love

20 Things To Do In Your 20s Instead Of Looking For Love

“Suddenly you’re 21 and you’re screaming along in the car to all the songs you listened to when you were sad in middle school and everything is different but everything is good.”
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Your 20s are a time for self-discovery, global exploration, and plain old messin' around. However, many young adults find that these years can be filled with the societal pressure to settle down with that special someone, soul mate, one true love, or, as I like call them, a fun-sucker. Just kidding (kind of). Anyway, here's a few things that you could try instead of looking for love:

1. Finish school and get a degree.

First and foremost, you should do one of the single, most important things you can do for yourself, especially in this day and age: Go to college. If you're not already in school, find something you're interested in, pursue it, and use it to fuel your future. Whether it's your bachelor's, master's, or even your Ph.D., start and finish it out strong — you'll thank yourself later.

2. Get into the best shape of your life.

Find your inner Kayla Itsines, go on Instagram to get some #fitspo, and whip your butt into shape. Whether it's the conventional eating healthy and exercising a couple times a week, or training for a marathon — go out and do it! Hot yoga and Zumba are also very in trend right now, so go give it a try.

3. Learn to cook.

Chances are you're probably living on your own for one of the first times, so why not learn how to make yourself a decent meal? While Raman noodles and hot pockets are very reliable, Pinterest has some great, easy recipes that don't require *that* much more work, yet they'll taste 10 times better than some pre-made, freezer-burnt cardboard boxed meal.

4. Get a job that you love and work your ass off.

Put that degree to good use and find a job that makes you happy. As the old saying goes, "love what you do, and do what you love." Once you find that, make some good money off of it before you're burdened with even more responsibilities (as impossible as that feels sometimes). Don't overwork yourself, but definitely dedicate a solid amount of time to your job.

5. Travel — anywhere.

Get out and explore the world! Go anywhere you can — abroad and out of the country, to another state, or even just to another city nearby. Go visit a far away friend that you haven't seen in awhile, or go road-trip across the country with the best people you know. Anything counts. Chances are most of us 20-somethings don't have the necessary funds to support one of those Tumblr-esque dream vacations, so don't beat yourself up if "traveling" means something a little less extravagant than a month-long European tour that's bound to make you Insta-famous.

6. Spend time with family.

Family is always there for you (blood is thicker than water) and from personal experience, I can say that I don't see them nearly enough as I should or would like to. Your family is always going to be there for you, so take this time to make it up to them for putting up with your angst-y teenage years. Go to your younger sibling's games and that weird third cousin's wedding, and embrace those moments. And If you can't physically be with your family? Well, don't forget to call — they'll appreciate it more than you'll ever know.

7. Focus on your friends and make some new ones.

Keep the old, the good, and the best friends close. Spend time with them — get Sunday brunch, go mini-golfing, or have a Netflix marathon together. Don't be afraid to bring new people closer, too. Always leave a little room for future friendships.

8. Go to a concert.

Whether it's across the country for Coachella, a one-day thing at a venue nearby, a local artist at the bar across the street, or if it's just an old favorite or a genre you've never even heard of — go out and experience it. Music is good for the soul and can heal in a way that most things can't.

9. Learn to do something new.

Learn how to play the guitar and upload a YouTube video singing along off-key, take a foreign language class, hell, go get your scuba diving license and go for a swim. If there's ever a time to try something you've never tried before, or have always secretly desired to attempt, now is the perfect time to do so.

10. Read and write.

Keep your brain stimulated. Reading and writing can be very therapeutic, in addition to educational. Let your mind escape into a good book or have a cathartic writing session to cleanse yourself of negative thoughts. It'll prove to be more useful than you think.

11. Make mistakes.

Sometimes it takes falling flat on your face to find out what does or doesn't work for you — or if you're anything like me, most of the time it takes a mistake to set you on the right path. Finding yourself requires trial and error. Don't be afraid to eff up every once and a while because everyone knows that one success can come from a thousand failures.

12. Stay out late.

This one might go along well with not being afraid to make mistakes because nothing good comes after midnight. But to reiterate, don't be afraid to make these mistakes! Go out with friends and stay out past your usual bedtime. Enjoy these nights while you still have a fully functioning liver, brain, and metabolism.

13. Catch up on some much-needed Zs.

After staying out late and potentially making some regrettable decisions, you'll definitely need those extra five minutes under the covers. Nothing is more blissful than staying in bed all day or taking that two-hour nap after a long day at work. Indulge in these extra moments of sleep because later down the road, they are going to be few and far between.

14. Get in touch with nature.

Go to the beach for a swim, go to the mountains for a hike or some skiing, or go to the desert (you know, if you're absolutely psycho and have a death wish). Whatever it may be, get off your phone and get outside. Look around and embrace the beauty of the world. Find some inner peace. Why look for love when you can see something just as beautiful all around you?

15. Learn to say "no."

In a generation of people-pleasers, we often aim to impress at our own expense and find ourselves doing things that we really have no desire to be doing. Quit feeling obligated to other people and only do things that you *want* to be doing. Apply this to everything you do, and I promise that you'll find a happiness you've never had before.

16. Love with your whole heart.

Even though you might not be looking for love in another person, you should still love everything you find yourself doing, and loving it with everything you have. Love your friends, your family, your job, and anything else you can. Life is too short to half-ass your way through it. Dedicate yourself to all of the things you love and take this time to find some self-love, too, because how can you be expected to love anything else if you don't love yourself first?

17. Do something absolutely ridiculous.

Do something totally insane. Why? Because why not. It's less of a waste of time than looking for a love that you'll never find (I promise, I'm not bitter). Go skydiving, get a tattoo, make a horrible investment in that broken down car that you're just *so sure* is the best deal ever. Don't worry about the judgment you might receive, you're in your 20s. This is basically normal. Who gives a damn? As long as you can handle the possible consequences, go for it. Do something you never dreamed of doing.

18. Come to terms with your past.

Forgive the ex that destroyed your trust or the old best friend who never really had your back. And if you can't find forgiveness, at least find some sort of acceptance. Let go of the past because it can't be changed. Don't let it dictate your future in a negative way. Learn from it, embrace it, and use it to your advantage in becoming a better person from it.

19. Get a dog (or a cat if you're one of *those*).

If you have the proper means to care for an animal, go get a dog or a cat. They can provide you with the companionship and love that you may otherwise be searching for in another person. It may be a good opportunity to fill that void, and practice some responsibility, too!

20. Sing and dance around in your underwear like a crazy person.

Completely let loose and have fun! When you're home alone, strip down, turn it up, and go wild. Watch yourself in the mirror and love what you see. Who doesn't love gettin' naked and belting out your favorite lyrics?

Bonus: If love happens to find you... Accept it!

Just because you aren't necessarily looking for love doesn't mean that you have to reject it. If someone happens to stumble into your life that you click with, don't fight it. Let it happen. Not looking for love doesn't mean you also have to be a cynical, anti-relationship, love-hater.

Cover Image Credit: http://rebloggy.com/post/love-photography-hair-girl-lights-night-city-dark-amazing-back-watching-looking/24769053521

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College As Told By Junie B. Jones

A tribute to the beloved author Barbara Parks.
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The Junie B. Jones series was a big part of my childhood. They were the first chapter books I ever read. On car trips, my mother would entertain my sister and me by purchasing a new Junie B. Jones book and reading it to us. My favorite part about the books then, and still, are how funny they are. Junie B. takes things very literally, and her (mis)adventures are hilarious. A lot of children's authors tend to write for children and parents in their books to keep the attention of both parties. Barbara Park, the author of the Junie B. Jones series, did just that. This is why many things Junie B. said in Kindergarten could be applied to her experiences in college, as shown here.

When Junie B. introduces herself hundreds of times during orientation week:

“My name is Junie B. Jones. The B stands for Beatrice. Except I don't like Beatrice. I just like B and that's all." (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 1)

When she goes to her first college career fair:

"Yeah, only guess what? I never even heard of that dumb word careers before. And so I won't know what the heck we're talking about." (Junie B. Jones and her Big Fat Mouth, p. 2)

When she thinks people in class are gossiping about her:

“They whispered to each other for a real long time. Also, they kept looking at me. And they wouldn't even stop." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 66)

When someone asks her about the library:

“It's where the books are. And guess what? Books are my very favorite things in the whole world!" (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 27)

When she doesn't know what she's eating at the caf:

“I peeked inside the bread. I stared and stared for a real long time. 'Cause I didn't actually recognize the meat, that's why. Finally, I ate it anyway. It was tasty...whatever it was." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 66)

When she gets bored during class:

“I drew a sausage patty on my arm. Only that wasn't even an assignment." (Junie B. Jones Loves Handsome Warren, p. 18)

When she considers dropping out:

“Maybe someday I will just be the Boss of Cookies instead!" (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 76)

When her friends invite her to the lake for Labor Day:

“GOOD NEWS! I CAN COME TO THE LAKE WITH YOU, I BELIEVE!" (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 17)

When her professor never enters grades on time:

“I rolled my eyes way up to the sky." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 38)

When her friends won't stop poking her on Facebook:


“Do not poke me one more time, and I mean it." (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 7)

When she finds out she got a bad test grade:

“Then my eyes got a little bit wet. I wasn't crying, though." (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 17)

When she isn't allowed to have a pet on campus but really wants one:

“FISH STICK! I NAMED HIM FISH STICK BECAUSE HE'S A FISH STICK, OF COURSE!" (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 59)

When she has to walk across campus in the dark:

“There's no such thing as monsters. There's no such thing as monsters." (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed, p. 12)

When her boyfriend breaks her heart:

“I am a bachelorette. A bachelorette is when your boyfriend named Ricardo dumps you at recess. Only I wasn't actually expecting that terrible trouble." (Junie B. Jones Is (almost) a Flower Girl, p. 1)

When she paints her first canvas:


"And painting is the funnest thing I love!" (Junie B. Jones and her Big Fat Mouth, p. 61)

When her sorority takes stacked pictures:

“The biggie kids stand in the back. And the shortie kids stand in the front. I am a shortie kid. Only that is nothing to be ashamed of." (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed, p. 7)

When she's had enough of the caf's food:

“Want to bake a lemon pie? A lemon pie would be fun, don't you think?" (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed p. 34)

When she forgets about an exam:

“Speechless is when your mouth can't speech." (Junie B. Jones Loves Handsome Warren, p. 54)

When she finds out she has enough credits to graduate:

“A DIPLOMA! A DIPLOMA! I WILL LOVE A DIPLOMA!" (Junie B. Jones is a Graduation Girl p. 6)

When she gets home from college:

"IT'S ME! IT'S JUNIE B. JONES! I'M HOME FROM MY SCHOOL!" (Junie B. Jones and some Sneaky Peaky Spying p. 20)

Cover Image Credit: OrderOfBooks

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The 7 Stages Of A Breakup, As Told By Netflix's 'Someone Great'

Alexa play "Truth Hurts" by Lizzo, and max volume, please.

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We all know how it feels to get your heart broken by a guy. Whether it be in your teens or in your 30s, everyone experiences it, or already has. After watching the movie “Someone Great" on Netflix, it hit me deep in my feels. If you haven't seen it yet, check it out. It made me realize all of the stages of going through a rough breakup, and I could not relate to a movie more.

1. When you first breakup and will cry about it to just about anyone

We all know that we do this almost immediately after a break-up. You are just trying to get out of the house so you go to the store, something reminds you of our ex, and next thing you know, you're talking the stranger's ear off in the grocery store for the next 2 hours.

2. When your friends call you and you say you're fine but you really haven't moved from your couch in two days and all you have done is eat two gallons of ice cream and watch "The Notebook" on repeat

"Just come do something with us, or let us come there."

"Nah, I'm okay, I actually have a super busy day today."

Yeah, if you mean busy as in binge-watching every episode of "Pretty Little Liars," then yeah, count me out of all plans so I can rewatch every episode for the next 3 weeks. We all know that feeling of not wanting to move out of bed for as long as you can after a break-up.

3. When that ONE song comes on at the mall, and you suddenly realize it was "your" song

This one hits differently. You're literally just minding your own business, trying to treat yourself to a little bit of a wardrobe change because of how sad you have been all week and BAM, it hits you like a train. Next thing you know you're crying in the dressing room of Forever 21 wondering where it all went wrong.

4. Finally caving in and hanging with your friends, realizing that this is what you needed all along

You never want to leave your bed after a breakup, you seem to cancel or bail out on every plan you try to make, then finally, after you have run out of tears, you actually follow through with a girl's night, and then you suddenly realize that all along, just time spent with the gals is what you needed. Trust me, been there, done that. In most cases, a dance party is also well needed.

5. The morning after your girl’s night, you realize that having these gals is better than the boy 

Having your girls there for you in such a tough time actually helps so much. It helps save the tears, the constant replaying of memories in your head, and saves you the time you could be wasting if you're sinking into a deep sadness over something so dumb. That support system is vital for post-breakup, and even I know that.

6. You let him go one last time

Whether it be writing a letter, throwing away all your old memories with him, or by finally getting all your clothes back from his place that have piled up over the past few months or years. It is a truly bittersweet feeling and might even hurt a little, but it's time. You're going to thrive without him.

7. You truly know how much better you’re doing without him

You have reached the point of no return. You’re finally thriving without him. You’re never going back, and you know how much potential your life has and how much better you are without him. Your heart is whole again.

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