20 Things About Myself That I'd Like to Improve On

20 Things About Myself That I'd Like to Improve On

We could all stand to better ourselves.
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Self-love is definitely a process, and I know I have a long way to go in my journey of self-discovery and becoming the best person I can be. I am getting there. There are still things about myself that I would like to change and/or work on to improve and, even though this is about me personally, I am sure that other people will be able to relate.

1. I want to be more assertive in my opinions and stand up for what I believe in.

2. I want to be louder and make certain that people can hear me.

3. I want to be kinder.

4. I want to be able to empathize with people more.

5. I want to physically walk with confidence.

6. I want to be a better leader.

7. I want to show people how much I care about them, and take privileges and people for granted less.

8. I want to look at the world more optimistically and more realistically, with a balance that focuses less on the negative side of things.

9. I want to be a hard worker and stop procrastinating all the time.

10. I want to be less fearful when I try new things, and just go for it.

11. I want to be more consistent in my habits and in what I say.

12. I want to be healthier, both through diet/exercise and through spirituality.

13. I want to rely less on the material things I own, like my phone.

14. I want to learn to be humble.

15. I want to help other people grow and discover themselves.

16. I want to practice gratitude for my situation and how far I have come.

17. I want to stop being so hard on and impatient towards myself and others.

18. I want to let go of the things that don't matter so much, and to stop dwelling on the past frequently.

19. I want to become wiser.

20. Finally, I want to become a better person as I see fit.

I am working on all of these things and, like I said, it is a process. I will find my way and work at it as I go, so there is no need trying to drive myself nuts because I'm not fully happy with the person I am yet. Patience. You will find and make your way.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Dirksen

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You Are A Lot Stronger Than You Think

You are loved
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Statistics on Domestic Violence

  • On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men
  • On a typical day, there are more than 20,000 phone calls placed to domestic violence hotlines nationwide.
  • Women between the ages of 18-24 are most commonly abused by an intimate partner

I normally do not write responses to the news. However, the White House made headlines when Rob Porter, White House Staff Secretary, was accused of assaulting his ex-wives. The person to out this horrific behavior was none other than his ex-wives, Colbie Holderness and Jennifer Willoughby.. his first ex-wife, Ms. Holderness released a picture of her black eye which was caused by her then husband.

Naturally, Porter tried to deny these allegations by saying that it was an “accident.” If I am not mistaken, that is the most common excuse a person will give. “It was an accident,” “I did not mean it,” “I will not do it again.”

What WAS shocking were Kelly Anne Conway and Sarah Huckabee Sander’s responses to the wives, when they came out in defense of Porter or… didn’t defend the victims. Ms. Sander refused to talk about the abuse and said the President wished Porter well for his future endeavors. Ms. Conway was quoted saying the following about Hope Hicks, Porter’s girlfriend: “I'm sorry for any suffering [Porter's ex] has endured, but in the case of Hope, I rarely met somebody so strong with such excellent instincts, and loyalty, and smarts.”

Strong, smart, loyalty, and instinctive. Words that were not given to the ex-wives but Hope Hicks.

Did Conway mean that women who are abused are dumb? Not loyal? Weak? Lack good instincts? If so, I am here to take a stand and say that Conway is wrong.

Women who go through abuse are not weak, dumb, disloyal, or lack instincts. Women who undergo this kind of trauma are loving, kind, loyal, and have good instincts. They are good and educated. Queens, mothers, sisters, women in power. You know who are weak, dumb, disloyal and lack instinct? Men who abuse their wives and girlfriends. Those people take advantage of their significant other’s love and compassion. It is not easy for a woman to talk about domestic violence.

Sure, men did abuse their wives back in the day and it was considered “normal.” As the consciousness of the society grew, more and more people spoke out against it. Kellyanne Conway’s comments are even more damaging to young girls in their teens and twenties. As women, we are susceptible of views on weight, skin color, the way we look, dress, if we are under or over educated. Now, women are listening to the comments coming out of the White House and should simply accept the appalling words from Huckabee Sanders and Conway? How is that right or fair? It is not.

No one, woman or man, is immune to domestic violence. To say that is completely ignorant and false. In a time where women are rising up and standing up against rolling back abortion rights, healthcare and standing up for their rights, these kinds of words are damaging and antithetical to the cause. Women should stick together. We should stand up for ourselves and for each other.

To every woman, you are strong, loved, intelligent, and loyal. To go through the trauma of abuse and escape it, is the definition of strength. To speak out against your abuser is courageous. You are a lot stronger than you realize. Do not listen to voices that say you are weak. To Kellyanne Conway, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and women who defend men like Porter, shame on you.

If you are being abused, please speak up. Your voice and life is valuable. Please contact the following:

The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
If you are deaf or hard of hearing, 1-800-787-3224

Cover Image Credit: Brooke Anderson

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You're Still Enough, Even When Everything Goes Off Track

Give yourself some credit.
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The other day, I posted a caption on Instagram of a quote I rapidly typed down as I saw another status of someone celebrating their 4.0 and all their great successes, and don’t get me wrong, I know this isn’t a comparison game and I am genuinely happy for their achievements, but it can seem discouraging when others are celebrating in areas I lack and breakdown, and I just hoped I’d be ending the semester on a happy note like them.

Maybe a little more effort next time around or better preparation for my finals would cure my mental fatigue at this point, but here’s what I had to say.

Lately, I’ve been enduring an internal struggle that I’ve been too ashamed to address. As school comes to an end, I must diligently remind myself that I am not defined by my grades or what my GPA reads on Gulfline; I wake up bright, excited and hopeful for what’s to come, but that’s if I ignore a lingering thought many college students deal with — I don’t know exactly what I want or even where I am going.
However, uncertainty fuels my drive.
I put forth an effort and continuously put my best foot forward with an optimistic mindset because although at times, I seem lost and the faint words “not good enough” start to trickle in, I know who I am becoming and who I will be. Every day, I’m building my character, experiencing highs and lows and overcoming obstacles, while building relationships and treasuring connections. I know I am loving, thoughtful, intuitive, and dedicated to being the best version of myself in this lifetime. So in case you’re struggling too, don’t sell yourself short because your soul is worth of being celebrated.

So here I am, reminding myself and you that we are still enough and valuable when things don’t go as planned and even when we don’t meet our expectations. It’s okay to cut yourself a break and know you can work harder this time around, and you are not defined by your GPA or your resume or how many friends you have.

You are not a statistic or another passing face in the crowd; so remember this life isn’t easy, but it’s so incredibly worth it.

Cover Image Credit: Ashley DeBoer

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