A while back , I saw a Facebook post titled “18 Lessons I Learned by My 18th Birthday.” I thought it was such a neat idea, so I wrote down my own list of lessons. Here we are over a year later with a platform to finally share them on.
1. Everybody is fighting some kind of battle, whether you know it or not.
Most people you meet are not going to lay out their life story in their first impression. Neither are you. When you are having a rough day, the last thing you want is someone honking his or her horn at you in traffic. Treat others as if their world is falling apart, and you can never go wrong. It just might be.
2. Pray! In times of joy, pray. In times of hurt, pray. When you’re somewhere in between, pray.
Prayer is spending time with God. He is the one who cares when you’re in pain. He is the one who is happy when you’re happy. Time spent with God is just like time spent with a best friend.
3. Forgiveness is difficult but necessary for a healthy life.
This means forgiveness towards others and towards yourself. Holding grudges holds you back.
4. Be genuine in every situation. Listen to what people have to say whether you disagree, don’t care, or don’t have time.
People appreciate when you invest time in them. They can recognize when you are being genuine or when you don’t care at all. Make a conscious effort to value your conversations.
5. Being sad is OK.
If we had never experienced pain, then how would we know what happiness feels like? Sadness gives us a standard for something better. “A certain darkness is needed to see the stars.” – Osho
6. Know who your friends are and revise the list as often as needed.
If you aren’t surrounded by people who make you better, then what is the point? Society tears us to shreds every day. If your friends do the same, distance yourself. You need people in your life who are honest with you, who tell you that you’re valuable, and who inspire you to be the best you can be.
7. Take one step closer to God every day.
This can be telling a coworker about Jesus, avoiding temptation, or waking up and saying, “Lord, have your way with this day.” Trusting God with little things is practice for trusting Him with the big things. This practice can bring growth and intimacy with God.
8. “Do one thing every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
Whether talking to a cashier scares you or giving a commencement address does, doing one thing every day that intimidates you will slowly expand your comfort zone.
9. Don’t allow people to have a say in your happiness. It’s up to you.
Your definition of happiness is yours and only yours. No one can ruin your happiness without your permission, so don’t give them permission.
10. However you express yourself, do it often and share it with the world.
Keeping yourself hidden won’t do you any good. Share who you are with others because they probably need someone like you in their life. Express yourself in whatever way makes you happy.
11. Don’t bottle up your emotions, past experiences, or little irrelevant stories.
The thoughts you have that you think no one cares about are brilliant. Allow yourself to be transparent. It’s true that some people don’t care what you feel or what you have to say, but some people do. Find those people and tell them how you’re feeling, drive them around your hometown telling them stupid stories about how you broke your elbow on the playground, and tell them about the girl in Walmart who insisted you two had gone to the same preschool.
12. Age does not determine maturity.
Millennials are thrown into a category of misinformed, uneducated, and lacking work ethic. That doesn’t define all of them. Take time to dig through and find the brilliant ones. Likewise, just because your elders aren’t good with technology doesn’t mean they can't teach you a thing or two.
13. If you talk a lot, learn to sit back and observe. If you don’t talk much, learn to speak your mind.
When you sit back and listen, you can learn a lot but your ideas are never voiced. When you talk all the time, your ideas are always heard but you are never learning. Find a healthy balance between speaking up and sitting back.
14. Think before you speak.
You’ve heard it a million times, but it is a great lesson to learn. Contemplate the words that are about to come out of your mouth. Are they positive? Could they hurt someone around you? Are you talking just to talk or do you have something meaningful to say?
15. Things are only as important as you let them be.
Everyone has experienced one of those “bad days” when nothing downright terrible has happened, but a bunch of little annoying things happened. You give these things power over you when you decide that they are important.
16. Patience really is a virtue.
Speaking from experience, things work out in the end. There was a time in my life when the world crashed down around me and I thought the rubble was all I had left. Years later, I realize how crucial that time in my life was. Everything worked out more than perfect. I wouldn’t change those moments because they have lead me to a life that I’m happy with.
17. Make wise decisions, but don’t over analyze.
The fear of failing is normal, but you’ll never enjoy life if you let the fear consume you. Sometimes the jump is worth the fall.
18. Find beauty in everything.
We miss pretty things most of the time because we’re in a rush, on our phones, or disinterested. People are beautiful when they don’t know someone is watching them. You are beautiful in the way you read these words. There is beauty in the taxi, on the sidewalk, in the mall, in class, at work. It’s everywhere. Make a choice to see it.
Do you have a list of your own lessons learned? Have any to add to my list? Write a few down and share them along with this article.
