My speech and debate club has truly had some odd discussions, and last year I tasked myself with recording interesting quotes. Here are some of my favorites!
1. "My eyebrows are separate but equal."
2. "Why are you opening up hell portals in your backpack?"
3. "In your communism, is there 'Pokemon GO!'? I leave it at this."
4. "I don't know anything about avocados!"
5. "I hope you win the lottery and die the next day."
6. "But then why don't you slash your own tires? He slashed three of yours, so just do the fourth one yourself."
7. "America does not run on Duncan, it runs on capitalism."
8. "It's like in the movies, when the guy is walking away from an explosion, but instead of fire, it's a giant fart cloud, and everyone behind him dies."
9. "I think that a cat was eaten by a poltergeist last night in my neighborhood."
10. From the only human who doesn't like "The Polar Express": "When I was raging about the 'The Polar Express' earlier, I swallowed some of my hair."
11. "Most people are smart enough to take the seed out of the avocado before they make guacamole."
"Yeah, if you do put it in your mouth without knowing, then you should not be eating avocados."
12. "Boobs. You either have them or you want them."
13. In response to, "You are what you eat.": "I've eaten many Hawaiians in my day. Hence the Hawaiian shirt."
14. "It's not murder if you pull a knife."
15. "Genetics and Jesus. The two G's." There's a pause as he realizes he messed up. "In my world, Jesus starts with a 'G.'"
16. "Sinner, sinner, I'm a winner."
17. C: "How many Obamas do you have to eat to become Obama?"
Z: "All of them."
D: "At least five."
M: "You wouldn't turn into Obama, though, you'd just turn black."
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