17 Hilarious WTF Quotes I Secretly Recorded My Speech and Debate Team Saying | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Entertainment

17 Hilarious WTF Quotes I Secretly Recorded My Speech and Debate Team Saying

"I think that a cat was eaten by a poltergeist last night in my neighborhood."

750
17 Hilarious WTF Quotes I Secretly Recorded My Speech and Debate Team Saying
Zainab Thompson

My speech and debate club has truly had some odd discussions, and last year I tasked myself with recording interesting quotes. Here are some of my favorites!


1. "My eyebrows are separate but equal."

2. "Why are you opening up hell portals in your backpack?"

3. "In your communism, is there 'Pokemon GO!'? I leave it at this."

4. "I don't know anything about avocados!"

5. "I hope you win the lottery and die the next day."

6. "But then why don't you slash your own tires? He slashed three of yours, so just do the fourth one yourself."

7. "America does not run on Duncan, it runs on capitalism."

8. "It's like in the movies, when the guy is walking away from an explosion, but instead of fire, it's a giant fart cloud, and everyone behind him dies."

9. "I think that a cat was eaten by a poltergeist last night in my neighborhood."

10. From the only human who doesn't like "The Polar Express": "When I was raging about the 'The Polar Express' earlier, I swallowed some of my hair."

11. "Most people are smart enough to take the seed out of the avocado before they make guacamole."

"Yeah, if you do put it in your mouth without knowing, then you should not be eating avocados."

12. "Boobs. You either have them or you want them."

13. In response to, "You are what you eat.": "I've eaten many Hawaiians in my day. Hence the Hawaiian shirt."

14. "It's not murder if you pull a knife."

15. "Genetics and Jesus. The two G's." There's a pause as he realizes he messed up. "In my world, Jesus starts with a 'G.'"

16. "Sinner, sinner, I'm a winner."

17. C: "How many Obamas do you have to eat to become Obama?"


Z: "All of them."

D: "At least five."

M: "You wouldn't turn into Obama, though, you'd just turn black."

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

These powerful lyrics remind us how much good is inside each of us and that sometimes we are too blinded by our imperfections to see the other side of the coin, to see all of that good.

695308
Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

The song was sent to me late in the middle of the night. I was still awake enough to plug in my headphones and listen to it immediately. I always did this when my best friend sent me songs, never wasting a moment. She had sent a message with this one too, telling me it reminded her so much of both of us and what we have each been through in the past couple of months.

Keep Reading...Show less
Zodiac wheel with signs and symbols surrounding a central sun against a starry sky.

What's your sign? It's one of the first questions some of us are asked when approached by someone in a bar, at a party or even when having lunch with some of our friends. Astrology, for centuries, has been one of the largest phenomenons out there. There's a reason why many magazines and newspapers have a horoscope page, and there's also a reason why almost every bookstore or library has a section dedicated completely to astrology. Many of us could just be curious about why some of us act differently than others and whom we will get along with best, and others may just want to see if their sign does, in fact, match their personality.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

20 Song Lyrics To Put A Spring Into Your Instagram Captions

"On an island in the sun, We'll be playing and having fun"

594253
Person in front of neon musical instruments; glowing red and white lights.
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

Whenever I post a picture to Instagram, it takes me so long to come up with a caption. I want to be funny, clever, cute and direct all at the same time. It can be frustrating! So I just look for some online. I really like to find a song lyric that goes with my picture, I just feel like it gives the picture a certain vibe.

Here's a list of song lyrics that can go with any picture you want to post!

Keep Reading...Show less
Chalk drawing of scales weighing "good" and "bad" on a blackboard.
WP content

Being a good person does not depend on your religion or status in life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.

We are all born to do something great. Whether that be to grow up and become a doctor and save the lives of thousands of people, run a marathon, win the Noble Peace Prize, or be the greatest mother or father for your own future children one day. Regardless, we are all born with a purpose. But in between birth and death lies a path that life paves for us; a path that we must fill with something that gives our lives meaning.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments