When it comes to history, you probably fall into one of three camps. The first is people who hate history. The second is people who have a general interest in history. The third is people who have a deep and undying love for a specific area of history. If you're one of the last type, and you specifically love Greece and Rome, you'll probably connect with these things.
1. You feel personally attacked by the burning of the Library of Alexandria.
We don't even know how it was burned, but whoever caused it? Screw that guy. So many books lost.
2. You have a favorite ancient playwright.
Sophocles? Euripedes? Aeschylus? Maybe you even branch out to the comedians. Aristophanes, anyone?
3. You have very strong opinions on the Athens v. Sparta debate.
You can love both, but you can only have one favorite. Don't lie to yourself, you know you love one more.
4. You don't even register nude statues.
It was just the norm back then. Naked statue? Eh, whatever. Clothed statue? Huh, that's different.
5. You probably would've killed Socrates too.
Don't get me wrong, I adore Socrates, but that dude was annoying.
6. You kind of understand Caesar.
I mean, sure, he did some awful stuff and became dictator and paved the road for the empire to start, but why did the Senate give him a dictatorship if they didn't want him to have it?
7. You know who the crappy authors were.
*cough cough* Caesar *cough cough*
8. You hate old interpretations of Sappho.
Stop pretending Sappho was straight. We all know that isn't true.
9. "Hero" doesn't mean a good person.
Seriously, what the heck Odysseus? How many women did you sleep with during your journey home to your wife? And Odysseus is probably the best you can get.
10. Mythology is 90% Zeus' fault.
If he would've just kept it in his pants...
11. Graffiti's been the same for a thousand years.
There are seriously pieces of graffiti in Pompeii that roughly translate to "I was here."
12. You've started to wonder if Romans had more than 5 names to pick from.
How many people named Marcus or Gaius or Publius can there be?
13. Every large animal is an ox.
This one you'll get I find you've the Gallic award. According to good old Julius, that elephant? Very big ox. That reindeer? Ox that looks like a deer. Any large animal? It's an ox. That's ancient writing for you.
14. You probably have nicknames for your favorite historical figures.
For instance, my friends and I call Augustus "Gus" and Philip of Macedon "Papa Phil". My personal favorite is Alexander the Great, or as we call him, Lexi the Pretty Important Guy.
The more you study history, the more fun you realize it is. People have been weird forever, and the Greeks and Romans were probably the weirdest. From ancient dick jokes to highly respected historical figures gossiping about each other, there's never a dull moment in the world of Classics, and that's why we love it so.
