As the weather gets warmer and classes come to an end it's safe to say everyone is basically thinking the same thing: thank God it's finally summer. Although summer means no school, it also means more time to work. Among the many jobs offered during the summer, life guarding is one of the most popular to have. It seems like a relatively easy job to handle but just like any job it has its own "perks". Myself being a lifeguard, here's to all of the summer lifeguards out there who are preparing themselves for the upcoming season.
1. The sweat.
So. Much. Sweat. Actually, when are you NOT sweating? You don't remember getting in the pool so why are you sitting on the stand in a puddle?
2. Water is life.
The average human body can contain up to 65% water while the average life guard consists of 99% water. It's crazy how much water one person can drink in one day, especially when you transform into a human sponge after being outside for god knows how many hours.
3. Prescription sunglasses.
You don't want your retinas to be seared like tuna fish so you make sure to have sunglasses with you at all at times. You find no shame in settling for $5 drugstore glasses, as long as they prevent you from going blind.
4. Freckles on freckles on freckles.
They multiply each day and the sun is their source of energy. By the end of the summer, the small collection has turned into a constellation over your body where you can play connect the dots.
5. Becoming a forecast fanatic.
It's become a ritual each day before your shift to see if the weather gods will bless you with rain, or even better a storm so you can close the pool early.
6. "Oh you're a lifeguard? Can you give me mouth to mouth? ;-)"
No. I will give you the proper form of CPR using a breathing barrier as instructed by the American Red Cross. This is not The Sandlot.
7. Free food.
Whether it's the pool members or the staff, you're always getting fed by someone. It's almost like compensation for making sure the kids don't drown or injure themselves.
8. Chlorine eau de.
No matter how hard you try you will always have that familiar lingering scent of chlorine and sunscreen for the rest of summer. The best you can do is try to mask it with another fragrance of your choice.
9. Cleaning just so you can be in the pool.
Seriously, no one likes cleaning but when it's 95 degrees outside with 110% humidity you are desperate enough to clean the scum line off in the pool as long as you are able to seek sweet relief from being on fire.
10. More than slight discomfort.
Seriously, there is no greater discomfort than having to wear a restricting suit for hours. Your friends might look at the marks on you and think someone beat you but really it's just an ongoing battle you have with your unforgiving uniform.
11. All yelling is created equal.
People like to think all your job consists of is yelling at kids all day but the reality is adults actually create more problems than their kids. The fun part is when they then question why they can't do triple back flips off the diving board.
12. Critiquing every other pool you go to.
You don't do it on purpose, it's just a habit really. You've earned your title as a lifeguard so it's only natural to feel obligated to observe and monitor the members of other aquatic facilities. It's just your way of upholding your lifeguard duty
