Sometimes certain truths are hard to hear; sometimes they change our total outlook on things and facilitate living a better life. Sometimes they are exactly what you needed to hear.
The reality is, we are too hard on ourselves. We think we need to be correct in every way and do everything right, however, that is not feasible; and that takes a lot of effort, leaving us exhausted and feeling like we are not good enough.
So, because I wish I would have realized these things earlier to save me the unnecessary effort, here are 12 things that you need to grasp to live a better and more fulfilled life.
Not everyone is going to like youGiphy
This is a hard pill to swallow. I was raised to be a people pleaser and often put others' feelings before my own; however, wasting your time to try and gratify or entertain someone instead of making yourself happy is illogical, and it took me a long time to figure that out.
Life is short; don't be some watered down form of yourself to make others happy.
It is okay to do things that are not productiveGiphy
It is okay to do thins to relax and calm down even if it is not considered profitable. It is okay to play games or doodle. It is okay to go get coffee without bringing your homework. It is healthy to take a break. Take a deep breath. Sometimes it is best to close your eyes and listen to your music or look outside and watch the business of the day occur.
We live in a generation that believes everything has to be productive and that there is no time for simple pleasures; destroy that concept. Your life is yours. It is not any less worthy spending time doing what makes you happy.
You cannot meet every body standardGiphy
In a society that values social media and its influencers so much, we never get a break from what the 'perfect body' is supposed to look like. Media's judgmental head has reared severely negative consequences associated with unrealistic body expectations like eating disorders, low self-esteem, and destructive health effects on children and teenagers who have had to grow up with these standards.
As I was watching Taylor Swift's new documentary on Netflix, what she stated deeply resonated with me: "Cause if you're thin enough, you don't have that ass that everybody wants. But if you have enough weight on you to have an ass, then your stomach isn't flat enough. It's all just fucking impossible."
It is better to look healthy than sick; it is better to love what you eat than what you don't. Who cares if you have a little fat where you don't want it? As long as you are being healthy to your body, you should love it. You cannot meet every unrealistic body standard. If someone truly loves you, they will love your body too.
Don't forget how hard you worked to get where you are atGiphy
Don't forget that once you dreamed to be where you are at now. Whether is going to college or working a job that you wanted, you once wished to be where you are now. If you are feeling discouraged, do it for the younger you that worked hard to be where you are at now.
It can be tough, especially when you are in college. The loads of homework and hours of studying can dishearten you. However, remember how hard you worked to get accepted. Remember how excited you were when you got the letter in the mail saying you were college bound.
Sometimes we need to take a step back and remember how grateful we are to be in the place we're at.
If there's one mindset that matters, it is that everything passesGiphy
Everything will be okay in the end. So if it isn't okay right now, just remember it isn't the end. The sun will rise again, the bad will pass, and you will be okay. Stay positive and keep your chin high--you got this.
Your abilities are not measured by one thingGiphy
Your intelligence is not solely measured by an exam. Your creativity isn't measured solely by output. Your desire is not measured by action. There is so much more to you and your abilities than society's expectations of how they should be displayed.
Family comes firstGiphy
Your family will always be number one and will always have your back. Show them the love they deserve and make sure to call and visit often.
People change--sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worseGiphy
People change for many different reasons, especially at the age when we are emerging into adulthood. Sometimes they're no longer compatible with our lives, we just have to accept it and move on. Let them change and grow how they want to--it is their decision on whether they want to grow with or without you.
People are selfish, even if they try not to beGiphy
Nobody is thinking about you as much as you are thinking about you; humans are naturally self-centered creatures. They are not paying attention to you nearly as you think they are--and that can be a good or a bad thing. You don't have to worry about the small things you are insecure about on your body, they are not noticing it. You don't have to feel embarrassed about a screw up you made, no one will remember it. But it is also essential to realize that most people are in it for themselves; it is a hard pill to swallow, but it is one that needs to be.
Time flies, even if you want to pause the momentsGiphy
When it is Monday, we want it to be Friday. When it is winter, we want the summer months. We wish time away so easily and never take a step back to see how fast it is actually going. It is important to appreciate the present and stop wishing time away. Instead of dreading a Monday, make it a good day. Every day is a blank canvas and you get the chance to paint it.
Your biggest regret will be that you didn't do what you loveGiphy
This can apply to anything, whether it is a college major, something on your bucket list, etc. Do not let your fears take over. Don't let any other factor except for your love for it influence your decision. Follow your heart and do what you want, because at the end of the day, that is what matters.
Healing is not linearGiphy
Getting better doesn't happen in a straight line. There will inevitably be bad days, things happen that are out of your control constantly and will disrupt the flow. It isn't acceptable to tell someone who is healing to just "shake it off, it can't be that bad." Recovering from a backslide takes so much time and effort and it isn't made any easier by people trying to invalidate how you feel. Take all the time you need, heal as you want, because it is your choice.