America–home of the free and land of the brave. In other words, the greatest country in the world. It’s hard not to be obnoxiously patriotic when you live in the free world. In my opinion, being obnoxiously patriotic is the best way to show your country how much you love it and are appreciative of all it offers you. Let’s celebrate the people who are overly patriotic and insanely in love with America— you know, those people who will be blaring the National Anthem at 8 a.m. and waving a flag all around the house.
Grab your American flag t-shirts and jean shorts, folks, because these patriotic people are about to give you a full dose of freedom:
1. They will wear anything with an American flag on it.
2. They can loosely (or precisely) recite the preamble of the constitution.
3. Anytime they hear the national anthem they stop dead in your tracks with their hand over their heart.
4. They thank every service member for his/her sacrifice to the country.
5. American history documentaries are their version of a movie night.
6. They own more than one American flag (one for the room, one for outdoor use, and a spare, of course).
7. They obnoxiously wave their flag around at family and social gatherings.
8. Their favorite bird is a bald eagle, obviously.
9. They will only buy American cars (beep beep in my jeep).
10. They get offended and are ready to throw hands when anyone insults America.
11. They belt out the words when singing “God Bless America.”