12 Reasons Why Severus Snape Is the Worst Person Ever

12 Reasons Why Severus Snape Is the Worst Person Ever

Is he a poor, friend-zoned, misunderstood hero? Think again.
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We’ve heard the tragic sob story about your friendzoning and you playing a double agent to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. We’ve seen your memories in the pensieve, and we’ve accepted that you really were on the Order of the Phoenix’s side after all. But Snape? You still suck. And here’s why.

  1. In "Prisoner of Azkaban," Snape substitute teaches for one of Remus Lupin’s Defense Against the Dark Arts classes. Despite the instructions left by Lupin, and the help of Hermione to explain to Snape where the class left off, Snape dives headfirst into the werewolf section. This is problematic mainly due to the fact that his intentions were that a student would discover Lupin’s true identity. In doing so, he also revoked Lupin’s right to teach his class about werewolves and to view them as people with “furry little problems” rather than as monsters, as Snape chooses to present.
  2. He may have secretly been on the right side, but he only came back from it when the love of his life was murdered. Snape was dutifully working for Voldemort right up until he found out that the prophecy he overheard meant that Lily would be killed. He never became a double agent or switched sides out of loyalty to justice or to Dumbledore—rather, he did it because he didn’t want one person to die. Who cares about the other hundreds of lives that were lost due to the terrorist organization that he was a part of? Whatever. Why should that be his problem? Then, he went on to imply that Dumbledore failed him and that Dumbledore should have saved Lily in return for Snape coming back to the good side.
  3. He unnecessarily bullied students to the point where he was Neville’s boggart. He may have had an awful childhood, and ran with a bad crowd, but nothing gave him the right to take up a position of authority and use it to torment children. A boggart takes the shape of the one thing you fear the most, and Neville chose Snape. That’s despite the fact that there was a mass murderer who ran a terrorist organization around, a suspected mass murderer who just broke out of Azkaban, and a Death Eater who tortured his parents to insanity. Nope, he was afraid of Snape above all of those things. T for troll.
  4. He didn’t care about Lily enough to save her husband and son; he only wanted her to survive, even if that doomed her to a life of misery. He literally could’ve asked Voldemort to spare the entire Potter family, but instead he requested that only his teenage infatuation be saved. Who cares if she doesn’t have her chump husband or her only son? Yeah, whatever.
  5. He called his best friend the worst racial slur in the wizarding world, and then acted wounded when she would no longer speak to him. In the heat of the moment, he referred to Lily as a “mudblood.” He then tried to tell her that he was sorry and that her blood status didn’t matter, even though his best friends and the organization he was a part of believed exactly the opposite. It’s no wonder she left him; no friend does that.
  6. In the "Deathly Hallows" film, he completely ignores James’ body and Harry crying in his crib to clutch Lily’s corpse. There’s really nothing else to add to this except that it’s creepy as heck.
  7. I would sugar coat this, but there’s just no way. Snape’s hair is just so gross. It’s a curtain of greasy black slime that covers his eyes constantly. Maybe Lily would’ve stuck around a little longer if he had discovered shampoo, or basic hygiene. The world may never know.
  8. His patronus was a doe, which is the same as Lily’s. James’ patronus, on the other hand, was a stag. While James and Lily complimented one another, Snape mimicked Lily. He was so infatuated with her that he didn’t notice he wasn’t a good match.
  9. He broke into Harry’s mind repeatedly and grew furious when Harry defended himself. This is ludicrous for multiple reasons. First off, he gave Harry absolutely no warning what he was about to do and no way to defend himself except to “close his mind.” Instinctively, Harry used his wand and involuntarily saw Snape’s worst memory. Because he is the bigger person, obviously, Snape then refused to give Harry lessons ever again and threw him out of his office. Mature.
  10. Snape was head of the Slytherin house, and showed favoritism towards his students (namely, Draco) to an abhorrent degree. While he would punish Gryffindors for even the slightest misstep, he would allow students of his house to get away with bullying, snark, sarcasm, and even outright degradation towards their classmates.
  11. He threatened to expel a student who made a ruckus in his class. Granted, Hermione had been stealing ingredients from his private stores at the time, and Harry had been selected to create a diversion. A dung bomb in a cauldron seems to be a slight misdemeanor unworthy of expulsion, however.
  12. He made fun of Hermione’s appearance and intelligence in front of the entire class on multiple occasions.

More or less, he’s just a scumbag who can’t teach and who is the worst possible excuse for a redemption arc that there is in this entire series. The one character I can think of who is less desirable is Umbridge. Severus Snape is the worst and there is really just no argument about it.

Cover Image Credit: http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/File:SS-DH2-Official-Wallpaper-severus-snape-23388300-1680-1050.jpg

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I Went To "The Bachelor" Auditions

And here's why you won’t be seeing me on TV.
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It’s finally time to admit my guilty pleasure: I have always been a huge fan of The Bachelor.

I can readily admit that I’ve been a part of Bachelor fantasy leagues, watch parties, solo watching — you name it, I’ve gone the whole nine yards. While I will admit that the show can be incredibly trashy at times, something about it makes me want to watch it that much more. So when I found out that The Bachelor was holding auditions in Houston, I had to investigate.

While I never had the intention of actually auditioning, there was no way I would miss an opportunity to spend some time people watching and check out the filming location of one of my favorite TV shows.

The casting location of The Bachelor, The Downtown Aquarium in Houston, was less than two blocks away from my office. I assumed that I would easily be able to spot the audition line, secretly hoping that the endless line of people would beg the question: what fish could draw THAT big of a crowd?

As I trekked around the tanks full of aquatic creatures in my bright pink dress and heels (feeling somewhat silly for being in such nice clothes in an aquarium and being really proud of myself for somewhat looking the part), I realized that these auditions would be a lot harder to find than I thought.

Finally, I followed the scent of hairspray leading me up the elevator to the third floor of the aquarium.

The doors slid open. I found myself at the end of a large line of 20-something-year-old men and women and I could feel all eyes on me, their next competitor. I watched as one woman pulled out her travel sized hair curler, someone practiced answering interview questions with a companion, and a man (who was definitely a little too old to be the next bachelor) trying out his own pick-up lines on some of the women standing next to him.

I walked to the end of the line (trying to maintain my nonchalant attitude — I don’t want to find love on a TV show). As I looked around, I realized that one woman had not taken her eyes off of me. She batted her fake eyelashes and looked at her friend, mumbling something about the *grumble mumble* “girl in the pink dress.”

I felt a wave of insecurity as I looked down at my body, immediately beginning to recognize the minor flaws in my appearance.

The string hanging off my dress, the bruise on my ankle, the smudge of mascara I was sure I had on the left corner of my eye. I could feel myself begin to sweat. These women were all so gorgeous. Everyone’s hair was perfectly in place, their eyeliner was done flawlessly, and most of them looked like they had just walked off the runway. Obviously, I stuck out like a sore thumb.

I walked over to the couches and sat down. For someone who for the most part spent most of the two hours each Monday night mocking the cast, I was shocked by how much pressure and tension I felt in the room.

A cop, stationed outside the audition room, looked over at me. After a brief explanation that I was just there to watch, he smiled and offered me a tour around the audition space. I watched the lines of beautiful people walk in and out of the space, realizing that each and every one of these contestants to-be was fixated on their own flaws rather than actually worrying about “love.”

Being with all these people, I can see why it’s so easy to get sucked into the fantasy. Reality TV sells because it’s different than real life. And really, what girl wouldn’t like a rose?

Why was I so intimidated by these people? Reality TV is actually the biggest oxymoron. In real life, one person doesn’t get to call all the shots. Every night isn’t going to be in a helicopter looking over the south of France. A real relationship depends on more than the first impression.

The best part of being in a relationship is the reality. The best part about yourself isn’t your high heels. It’s not the perfect dress or the great pick-up lines. It’s being with the person that you can be real with. While I will always be a fan of The Bachelor franchise, this was a nice dose of reality. I think I’ll stick to my cheap sushi dates and getting caught in the rain.

But for anyone who wants to be on The Bachelor, let me just tell you: Your mom was right. There really are a lot of fish in the sea. Or at least at the aquarium.

Cover Image Credit: The Cut

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11 Amazing TV Shows That Are Ending in 2019

All good things must come to an end.

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It might just be the beginning of 2019 but there are many TV series wrapping up already. There are many breathtaking and original pilots around along with several reboots coming. This might be one of the greatest year for TV.

However, all good things must come to an end. Some series have been planned out and are going to be finished while others have been cut short. Sadly, here's a list of TV series to say goodbye to this year.

1. The Big Bang Theory (CBS)

Final Date: May

12 Seasons//279 episodes

2. Orange is the New Black (Netflix)

www.youtube.com

Final Date: End of 2019

7 seasons//91 episodes

3. Jane the Virgin (CW)

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Final Date: Mid-late 2019

5 seasons//100 episodes

4. Games of Thrones (HBO)

HBO

Final Date: Summer

8 Seasons//73 episodes

5. Broad City (Comedy Central)

Comedy Central

Final Date: March

5 seasons//50 episodes

6. VEEP (HBO)

HBO

Final Date: Spring

7 seasons//67 episodes

7. Homeland (Showtime)

Showtime

Final date: Summer

8 seasons//96 episodes

8. Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (Netflix)

Final date: January 25

4 seasons//52 episodes

9. The Affair (Showtime)

Amazon

Final Date: End of 2019

5 seasons//42 episodes

10. Friends From College (Netflix)

Final Date: End of 2019

2 seasons//16 episodes

11. Crashing (HBO)

HBO

Final Date: End of 2019

3 seasons//24 episodes

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