1) The kid who rides to class on a motorized skateboard
Listen, I have to give you props for creativity, but please stop nearly running me over while you zoom to class. Walk like the rest of us, we have to burn off that Freshman 15 weight somehow.
2) The athletes
I understand that you played soccer in high school, but the intramural team game isn't the Fifa World Cup. Also, to the athletes actually on teams, we get it- you're an athlete. You don't have to wear your Nike branded backpack, shorts, t-shirt, and shoes every time you go to class. Do you own nothing other than what your coach gave you to wear?
3) The sorority girl
This is essentially the same thing as a VSCO girl. Scrunchies, fabric headbands, Kendra Scott necklaces, Lokai and Pura Vida bracelets, Hydroflask covered in stickers, Macbook, also covered in stickers, an oversized t-shirt, Nike sneakers, and a thrilling choice between Nike shorts and Lululemon leggings.
4) The guy who always wears suits
I'm all for cutting guys slack for wearing suits during fraternity pledging, but the guy that wears one every. single. day. needs to calm down. This student likes dressing up for the first day of school…and made it last all year.
5) The people who always seem to be in their hammocks
Do you guys go to class? Or do you just sit on the quad all day? These students may appear to be studious, always accompanied in their hammocks by their laptops, but in reality they just watch Netflix all day.
6) The studious one
We all know the people that are ready to cry after getting less than an A on any assignment. One sage piece of advice: C's get degrees, folks.
7) The frat guy
His name is probably Brad, Chad, or Thad, and his hobbies include shotgunning beers, Juuling, and punching holes in his wall. His room is covered in empty beer cans, and there's a bong on his table. A sports game is on the tv. Can you see it as vividly as I can?
8) The gym rat
This student cannot get through a conversation without mentioning their gym habits. They went to the gym at 6am this morning, got in a quick workout after a healthy lunch, and like to go at night to de-stress from the day. How do you get any work done?
9) The student always complaining about their workload- with an easy major
Seriously, how hard can a sociology or English major be? Please leave space in the library for chemistry and engineering majors.
10) The organized one
This is the girl who sits next to you in class and takes color-coded notes every day in 7 different kinds of highlighters and pens. And her handwriting is so neat! She lives in the library and is always studying. You're jealous of her dedication, be honest.
11) The one that doesn't have to try
These are the people who go out and party the night before a test, and, with no studying whatsoever, get a 91 on the test when the class average was a 67. Stop ruining the curve!
