I recently heard this statistic: Americans eat approximately 100 acres of pizza a day.
There has to be a reason for such a vast consumption of the same thing, right?
Life can feel like a lot to handle sometimes. When this happens, it can be rather difficult to find a solution. Luckily, after research and life experience, I have found that more often than not, the solution is an easy one.
Pizza can solve many of life’s regular struggles.
1. Are you hungry?
You haven’t consumed enough calories yet today, so your body is telling you that you need to eat. An easy way to get those calories in is to eat something cheesy and delicious…like pizza. It doesn’t take much to fill the pizza-shaped void in your soul.
Host a pizza party! Invite everyone you have ever met. Everybody will love you for it, and no one can turn down free pizza. Remember when you were a kid and you could have pizza parties at school for your birthday? All the other kids wanted to be your best friend. Because of you, they had pizza. This same kind of bribery works with adults too.
3. Are you going out tonight?
Pizza is a great thing to eat when you get home after a night out with your friends (the ones you made at your pizza party). You want to make sure that you don’t wake up regretting what you did the night before, so ensure that you will be hangover-free by eating pizza!
4. Did you go out last night?
So, you didn’t avoid your hangover? That’s fine, it happens to the best of us. But instead of spending your morning feeling headachy and nauseous, you could be eating pizza. Avoid all of the physical suffering.
5. Are you tired?
Pizza is packed with tons of carbs, which give you energy…right? If not, you can always convince yourself that. Eat some pizza, get your energy, and go about your day feeling great.
6. Are you lost and need directions?
Why not get some food too? Go to a pizza restaurant and eat while you try to figure out where you’re going. Pizza chefs definitely know their way around a kitchen so they must know their way around a lot of other places too.
7. Are you struggling with math?
What better way to put your mathematic knowledge to practice than by cutting a pizza? You get to learn and eat at the same time! Daria said it best...
8. Do you have a friend with an upcoming birthday?
You’re throwing your friend a party and you’re not sure what it’s missing. It’s pizza. Who needs birthday cake when you can have pizza? Not only that, but there is also dessert pizza that is made to have candles in it. Blow your friend away with an awesome party and a unique birthday cake that they’ll never forget.
9. Do decisions stress you out?
No need to fear! Pizza is here! Sure there are countless toppings that you can put on your pizza, BUT there is nothing that you can put on pizza to make it bad. So, no matter what you choose, you can’t go wrong, minimizing the stressful act of decision making.
10. Does the opposite sex make you nervous?
Order a pizza! You can practice flirting with the delivery guy (or girl). This gives you the rare opportunity to flirt with a stranger from the comfort of your own home. And you never have to see them again so don’t have to worry about embarrassing yourself. On top of that, they already have your number so who knows? ;)
11. Are you a broke college student?
So, you’re in school and living on your own is expensive. However, pizza is always a good, cheap option for food. Not only is it inexpensive, but it can also be A LOT of food, so you’ll have leftovers for at least a few more meals. And it makes a great snack while you’re pulling all-nighters.
No matter what life throws at you, you can always turn to pizza.
