11 Things All Winos Know To Be True
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11 Things All Winos Know To Be True

Whoever said "diamonds are a girl's best friend" was a big fat liar

11 Things All Winos Know To Be True

Throughout life, you eventually make the tough realization that friends, significant others, and relationships in general can fade away more easily than you had ever imagined. However, at one age or another, you also realize that there's one, magical liquid that is definitely here for the long haul: wine. Whether you're a classy, graceful woman who enjoys a well-aged class of Chardonnay with dinner, or your a sorority girl with a craving for something fruity, wine never fails to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside. Plus, it gets better with age, just like you (*hair toss*.) We're all winos at heart, so here are a few reasons why wine is so easy to love, no strings attached:

1. It's extremely loyal

Oh, you made plans with your BFF and they bailed on you? What a shame. Guess I'll have to finish this entire bottle of pink Moscato by myself instead!

2. It's not judgmental

"7th Netflix episode in a row? You go girl. Now pour another glass of me, grab that pint of Cherry Garcia and this'll really be a party."

3. It helps you unwind after a long day

Because adulting is like, really hard

4. It never gets boring

There are so many varieties and shades to choose from that going into the liquor store is like looking at a boozy rainbow (and the pot of gold at the end is full of more wine.)

5. It always knows how to boost your confidence

If you don't have the courage to talk to your ~crush~ who's standing across the room, just have a couple of glasses and you're guaranteed to feel like a fun (tipsy) goddess.

6. It doesn't get jealous

If you want to hang out with a different alcohol, wine understands (although it generally advises against tequila. Bad things always happen when you drink tequila.)

7. It'll always join you for a dinner date

Wine is always great company, even if your dinner is just dino nuggets.

8. It can never leave you

So you turn into the spawn of satan when you're on your period? That's okay. Wine doesn't have legs to run away with.

9. It's a good listener

You can complain all you want about that annoying girl from work and wine will totally understand (and definitely won't tell you that you're being too judgy.)

10. It'll help you make other friends

Because nothing brings girls together faster than realizing that they like the same kind of Yellowtail, amirite ladies?

11. Even when it's cheap, it's still classy

You can get a box of Franzia for $15 and then look down on your friends who are drinking light beer. (Ick, peasants.)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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