It’s that time of year again. Papers, tests, and projects all piling up faster than you could have ever imagined. Just like the last two years of my college career, I’m spending this late April/early May procrastinating in any way possible. No matter that I have two 15 page papers due in a week and a half, or that I’ve yet to do any of the readings that will likely appear on my in-class exams. I’ve even taken to asking people in my classes if they’ve started writing their papers/studying so that I can feel better knowing I have someone to fail with rather than just doing the work. So, here are just a few of the things that I personally would rather do than start my finals work:
1. Watch Lost
I guess Lost is kind of old news since I remember it being around when I was in sixth grade, but I just started it on Netflix last month and I literally cannot stop watching it. There’s a new twist every episode and it’s so confusing and I have so many questions about everything. I'm convinced that Lost is actually more stressful than any of my schoolwork.
2. Make super elaborate study guides and flashcards that I don’t actually need
Rather than just looking at the information in my book and actually trying to absorb it, I have this method where I spend hours making 100 flashcards or a fancy color-coded study guide. This makes me feel like I’m doing something productive when in fact I’m really just pushing off doing any real studying. I highly recommend this for anyone who wants to feel like they're doing something without actually doing it.
3. Attempt to follow hair or makeup tutorials on YouTube
Lately I’ve been really into the idea of being able to do crown braids or waterfall braids on my own head. Despite the fact that I can barely do a regular old French braid, I watch these quick five minute videos thinking that I’ll be able to follow along step-by-step and end up with beautiful, Elsa from "Frozen" level braids. What normally happens is I end up with a tangled knot on my head and a really pissy mood, but hey, at least I didn’t accomplish anything useful.
4. Drink wine
Enough said. I’ve been going through at least a bottle a week for the last few weeks.
5. Look at pictures from when I studied abroad and cry
WHEN CAN I GO BACK TO EUROPE? Finals week really draws out my nostalgia. Finals weren’t this bad in Paris because it was Paris! :((
6. Delegate myself assignments to do later in the week
Tomorrow I’ll write my paper for European Renaissance & Enlightenment. Wednesday I’ll work on my paper for film class. Thursday I’ll start that business proposal. Today—oh, look at that! No assignments to work on today.
7. Clean
Note: I actually despise cleaning a whole lot, but not quite as much as I despise tackling huge projects that I’ve been putting off for a month. When I’m feeling kind of motivated and in gear, instead of directing this at banging out a paper, oftentimes I’ll clean the bathroom or fold my clean laundry that’s been sitting on my floor for a week. Essentially, it’s being productive in all the ways that I don’t need to be productive.
8. Try to take a selfie
Cue taking 50 pictures (ranging from super average to horrifying), scrolling through them, then laughing/crying at my trying-to-be-hot face.
9. Photoshop said selfies
Then delete them anyway.
10. Stalk people from high school!
Yeah, this is a good one. I waste hours looking at people I went to high school with, and their significant others, and their significant others’ friends, and their significant others’ friends’ siblings … You get the picture.
11. Light myself on fire and throw myself into a pit of starving hyenas
Yup.
So there's 11 new ideas for anyone who was running out of ways to procrastinate doing their schoolwork. Happy finals week, everyone!
