Ah, the Big Apple. As someone who's been born and raised in New York City, I have truly seen it all. There is no limit to the crazy things you'll see on your daily walk down the street. Life is just so different, and you're taught from a young age that there really is no other place like it. Over time, I've noticed that there are certain mannerisms and little quirks that make New Yorkers so different from every other type of person. And sorry to break it to you all, but Long Island and Westchester do NOT count as the city. Let's keep it real, did you really think the Metro-North or Long Island Railroad would compare to a real MTA ride? Here I've compiled a list of 10 things you know if you're a real city person and not some fake who moved here for the summer.
1. Showtime doesn't mean the start of a Broadway show. It means some man dancing on the poles in your subway car and nearly hitting your face.
Have you ever heard those two glorious words, "It's showtime!" Probably in a posh setting. However, in NYC, it means you're going to have to dodge some guy's sneaker as it flies by your face while he slides down the pole in an already crowded subway car. Or, if it's a real banger, you'll be lucky enough to catch a rat dancing down the pole (Click HERE for the proof).
2. There's a new word out every week.
Let's keep it real, the word "deadass" originated in New York City. Honestly, they lost me a little after "no cap." Not only are we known for the most extra language on this planet, but somehow also the most creative. There are literally new words my guy friends say every week that I can't even try and understand anymore. If you just moved here, you better have Urban Dictionary open on Safari every two seconds.
3. Bacon, egg, and cheese on a bagel with an Arizona Iced tea, please.
This is a New York City specialty. Nothing hits more different than ordering this from a humble bodega a block away from your apartment. This is also an amazing Sunday breakfast for those hangovers you just can't seem to cure. It's also very affordable because let's be honest, who can afford Pressed Juicery every morning for the fifth day of your juice cleanse?
4. Homeowning? We don't know what that is.
If you live here, you live small, baby. Apartments are really the only affordable and most convenient option there is out there to live in the city. There aren't really many homes except in Queens, where you can expect to find townhouses and smaller sized houses. Sure, there are extravagant penthouses on the Upper East Side, but that's reserved for the Gossip Girl dream.
5. No one, and I mean no one, has their driver's license.
There are exceptions of people who do drive in the city, but honestly, why in the world would you need a license when the MTA can take you across all five boroughs? I'm 18 and I JUST got my permit, and most of my friends haven't even started to learn. Plus, driving in the city versus the taxi drivers is just asking for a disaster. And, don't even get me started on the absurd prices on parking and limited spots for parallel parking.
6. Times Square is actually the WOAT, says every New Yorker ever.
Listen, I don't care how happy you are when you visit Times Square after living in North Carolina for your whole life, but trust me, there is nothing worse than the giant billboards and smell of B.O. All New York City residents avoid it like the plague, and for a freaking reason. Sure, we'll go for the occasional picture or dinner at Dos Caminos, but you will NEVER see us there otherwise. Don't even remind me about New Year's Eve.
7. $1 pizza is the hidden gem you need as drunk food.
$1 for a slice of pizza? I'll take five. There is no way you could convince me otherwise that this plate of grease and old tomato sauce shouldn't go in my mouth. 'Nuff said.
8. Manhattan means "the city." If you're in any other borough, you call it by its name.
"Where are you heading tonight?"
"Oh, just the city."
Doesn't matter which part of the city you're going to, doesn't matter if you're on the tip of New Jersey. Every part of the city is the city. However, if you're heading down to Long Island City for some dope food, you'd say you're going to Queens.
9. Every little thing is expensive.
$16 for a cocktail? Sounds about right. $50 for a cycling class? Sounds like a deal to me. Sadly, it is true, New York City is the most expensive place to live, and not just because of the housing. Restaurants charge so much for even the smallest plates, and a lot of facilities like gyms and nail salons overcharge. A lot of people work two jobs to afford a luxurious lifestyle, and can you blame them? However, over time, $30 facials start sounding cheap.
10. Despite it all, you can't imagine living anywhere else.
I mean, yeah, you've contemplated moving to Boston so many times that it's insane. But NYC is a one-of-a-kind spot and truly prepares you for any kind of situation ever. From rats in the subway and hot dogs on the streets in carts, there's nothing you won't see or experience. Plus, we have not one, but two amazing baseball teams that you can spend your time cheering for on the weekends. It's really a win-win if you ask me. So, I'll stick with my tiny apartment and my MTA, thank you very much.
