Whether you've already graduated, or are still in college now, it's obvious that over the years you have done some pretty stupid things. Don't worry, though, you're not alone. Here's a list of some things that you've done throughout your college years that probably should have killed you, but you were lucky enough to have survived.
1. Having lofted beds.
These things are about 8 feet off the ground and you have to climb up the frail, wooden backboard (or ladder if you're lucky enough to have one) just to get into bed. I’d imagine falling off one would leave a girl with at least three broken bones, a cast and a sling that had to be worn for seven weeks. Those things are terrifying!
2. Sharing food with strangers on the street.
It happened, admit it. Walking home after a Saturday night with your friends and you spot a guy a couple hundred feet away with a slice of pizza, so you find yourself asking for a bite or two. People would usually be just as drunk and willing to share, but who knows what kind of germs or weird, deadly mouth infections they could’ve had going on?!
3. Eating food out of random house kitchens.
If you were ever looking for me and my friends late at night after a party, you wouldn't have to look much further than the cabinets of a random ass kitchen. Sounds harmless enough. But, what we put in that microwave typically included cheese that was probably sitting out for days, bread that was kinda wet on one side with something that kinda smelled weird, but was probably fine and any type of condiment we could get our hands on. It’s a freaking miracle that we're still here today, E. coli and salmonella free.
4. Walking around houses without shoes.
Between shards of broken glass, dried random blood stains (from “boys being boys”), beer and every possible bodily fluid soaked into the carpet, one wrong step could’ve been life ending.
5. Going out in close to zero degree weather in close to zero clothing.
It may be -3 degrees in the winter, but wearing sensible clothing to a house party was not in the cards on the weekends. Saying, “F*ck it, I'm wearing my alcohol coat tonight” made sense at the time, but technically, no, using Jack and Jim as a coat would most likely leave us with hypothermia.
6. Dancing on elevated surfaces.
Sure, standing on tables, chairs or window ledges is dangerous in general, but doing it in heels while attempting to dance to a Nicki Minaj song is really living life on the edge.
7. Running in heels.
Uh, sorry… did you expect me to WALK to catch up to my girl friends who are almost 100 feet ahead now??
8. Allowing random guys to bring you back to their place with the promise of Dominoes.
Sure!! It sounded like a good idea at the time because you were starving and out in the cold. But once you and your posse got there and realized there was no pizza or cheesy bread, you knew something was wrong. But luckily and surprisingly, you made it out alive.
9. Falling asleep wherever looked comfortable.
If you have never woken up on a random couch in a random apartment building or a random bed, good for you. But for the rest of us, the "opening-your-eyes-and-not-knowing-where-the-f*ck-you-were moments" were far from safe.
10. Sitting on toilet seats in disgusting places.
The golden rule of “squat if it looks or smells like an animal may have died in here within the past three hours” never really applied in college. It was easier to plop down and do your business with a stupid “wow, until I just sat down I had no idea I was this drunk” grin on your face — but you can get some legitimate diseases from nasty toilet seats. Also, dripping dry just isn’t good for personal hygiene.