10 Things You Don't Know You're Doing To Annoy Your Barista
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10 Things You Don't Know You're Doing To Annoy Your Barista

Tips to make this easier on both of us.

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10 Things You Don't Know You're Doing To Annoy Your Barista
Bustle

We all have that neighborhood coffee shop that we love to go to. When you walk in the entire staff already knows your name and order. You're usually greeted with "Hey, John! Got your croissant and whole milk mocha for you, just the way you like it!" It's sort of like "Cheers" but with a lower ABV. This is the place that truly gets your day going in the right direction. What you may not know, is you may have some seriously bad habits that make your morning trip hell on your baristas. I've spent the past week interviewing my coworkers and asking them what some of the worst things regulars tend to do in our shop. I've compiled a list of ten habits that might sure enough get you on a barista's bad side.

1. "Actually, can I get that iced?"

You have had the time it takes to get up out of bed, come to my cafe, stand in line, order, and pay to determine if the weather outside is making you feel like you want a hot or cold drink. The biggest problem with this is that I can't just take your hot drink and pour it over ice. Once that milk hits the steam wand, molecules are buzzing, milk is curdling, espresso thinks it's doing one thing. Drinks are a chemistry and you just walked on up and asked me to change my formula.

2. Throwing trash into the bag you see me changing.

I have come out from behind my wall to go change the unsightly garbage so that your stay in my cafe is a little bit nicer. There is no reason for you to decide that right now is the best time for you to get us and throw away your muffin scraps. The trash is clearly overflowing and I'm putting a fresh bag in the can. Instead of walking over and avoiding eye contact with me so that you can get that little bit of garbage in my full bag, wait the five seconds so that the new trash bag is ready for you. Be an example for everyone else and don't treat me like I'm the trash can here.

3. I cannot serve food out of the oven. Period.

I know, I know, I know. I'm the worst human ever because I have to give you the croissant that is 30 minutes old instead of the scalding hot one that was just cooking at 400 degrees for an hour. It's almost as if people don't seem to understand that there are laws around this stuff. Remember the McDonald's cup lady, yeah she's been totally demonized by urban legend when in all reality she was an elderly woman served coffee at 200 degrees and suffered life threatening burns. I know your pastry tastes so much better with a health risk, but I'm not going to lose my job because you have a hang up about "freshness".

4. This is not Panera, pick up your trash.

This heading is a direct quote from a coworker of mine. There is nothing worse than when I have a crowded cafe full of people, ten drinks backed up on the bar, and now my manager has to send me out to bus tables just because y'all couldn't think to throw your cups away before you left. I went through months of training to figure out the correct time and temperature it takes to froth your extra dry coconut milk cappuccino, so the least you can do is kindly move your arm a foot to the right on your way out the door and drop that paper waste in there, Susan.

5. Leave a Tip.

If I have taken the mental energy to memorize your drink order, name, and what time of day you come to have it all ready for you, then you can at least drop a couple quarters into our tip jar. You might not realize this but minimum wage is by no means a living wage. My entire check goes to rent and utilities and your tips are what allow me to eat on my breaks. I am serving you with a much bigger smile and peppier attitude than I am getting paid to do, so just help a person out every once and awhile.

6. You are not the only person using the bathroom.

I cannot tell you how many times that has been my exact face walking into the bathroom to clean it. We see you walk in and we see you walk out. I know it was you. Next time you're in a cafe bathroom just take two seconds to remember that the same person making the stuff you eat is also cleaning up the stuff you're leaving behind. Yeah, gross.

7. Persistent flirtation will rarely get you anywhere.

The only thing worse than someone who doesn't take the hint that you aren't flirting back, is someone who doesn't take the hint and comes back every single day. It is my job to be nice to you. It is my job to smile extra wide. It is my job to ask, "Would you like anything else with that?" It is not an invitation for you to wink and smirk. I promise more times than not, after you think you've successfully landed a line on a barista we turn towards the nearest coworker and recreate this wide eyed Tom Baker look or make a quick "Help me!!!" signal. Now, I've had plenty a real customer crush/romance so trust me when I say, if you're not getting a number after the first couple attempts and that is the only reason you come in the morning, find a new cafe.

8. Handing your drink back.


I have had *so* many regulars who get a drink handed to them that isn't exactly the way they wanted it and their response is to simply hand it back to me. No words. No explanation. Just handed it back expecting me to know what is wrong and how to fix it. If something is wrong with your drink, I will gladly fix it. But please for the love of god tell me what you need. While baristas have many skills, mind reading is not one of them. I want to make your experience as nice as possible but you've gotta work with me!

9. Change.

I'm gonna keep this one short and sweet. I don't know what about me says to you that I know how to do math, but I don't. If your drink is $4.17 and your give me a $10 bill. I'm going to type that into my register, it will tell me $5.83, and that is what you are getting. No more of this, "Wait, I think I have a quarter." No more staring at me after you hand me extra change because my brain is going into meltdown mode. Even better, just give me a credit card.

10. "Can I get some sample cups?"

Here's the deal, I love sampling. I love that I have the ability to let you try all of the things that I love serving. But when you see me running around yelling orders at other baristas, milk all over the bar, a line out the door, and sweating dripping out of every pour of my body; DO NOT come up and asking me for sample cups. Do you realize I have to stop every single thing that I'm doing so that I can run into the back for some four ounce paper cups that might give you a sip, at most, of our chai? You know what a chai tastes like! And if you don't, give me five minutes until I'm not at a height of mania to explain the dynamics of black tea and cinnamon.

In summation: Just be nice to your baristas. We live to serve and if we are going to see you every single day, we want to serve someone who's face we don't want to rip off.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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