There comes a time in your life when you are first introduced to the wonderful world of coffee. For me, that day happened around the age of 13. I can still remember the caramel Frappuccino from Starbucks being the cause of an addiction I'm not sure I want to overcome. I remember watching "Gilmore Girls" with my mom and realizing we were coffee addicts, just like Lorelai and Rory Gilmore. Here are the top signs that you're also a coffee fanatic.
1. You literally can't function without it.
Not that you don't want to. You just can't. It's part of your everyday routine, and if you have to skip it, your body shuts down. Words don't form sentences. A day without coffee is a day you don't want to be awake.
2. You're upset when people don't have coffee, especially in the morning.
Like, I'm sorry. Are you even human? How can you be this happy in the morning without caffeine? No, how are you even awake without it? I don't think we can be friends anymore.
3. You don't know why people have to ask you if you like coffee.
Yes, I like it. It's how I live. Well, that and oxygen.
4. Sometimes you wish you could inject it directly into your bloodstream.
"Doctor, please, just give me the espresso shot. Please."
5. You're asking because…?
Seriously? You should always assume I want need coffee. It is its own food group at this point.
6. When your friends try to have a coffee intervention.
"Don't ignore me! I swear I just need one more cup of coffee. Just one more!"
7. When it's 11 p.m. but you want to go to bed early.
I can't stop, and I won't stop.
8. When your friends ask you what you want to do, you suggest getting coffee.
First date? Let's get coffee. Haven't seen you in a while? Let's get coffee. Need a study buddy? So, Starbucks or the coffee shop down the street? Basically, I just need coffee.
9. When other people don't like coffee, you don't understand.
I'm sorry, what did you say? I thought everyone liked it. It's a staple food. Quite frankly, this friendship might be over for real.
10. You can't deal with people until you've had your coffee.
Don't talk to me until I've had my fourth cup of coffee, please. It's just better for everyone that way.
Sometimes, you just get too eager to get your coffee and accidentally end up ordering three cups to go, and sometimes the small diner has 6-oz. cups and you insist on having a bowl full of coffee instead. You're not sure anyone else gets as excited about it like you do, but it's OK because all you need in life to be happy is coffee.
