1. He will ask you out on a real, official date. One that isn't "Netflix and Chill."

If he is interested, he will be willing to invest time, attention, and seven seconds to send you a text saying “hey, let's go out for dinner sometime.” It’s as simple as that.

There is no rule of dating that says you shouldn’t want to be taken out on a date just because it is 2017 and dating is not the formal, conservative process it was fifty years ago.

You are allowed to want more than the easy, physical relationship that comes with being buzzed into his apartment at 10pm on a Friday night. You aren’t high-maintenance or old-fashioned because you won’t go over to his place before he takes you on a date, and if you believe he’s going to lose interest, he’s probably not ready to give you the relationship you want.

Pursue the relationships in which taking you out on a date is just as important as taking you to bed. If your expectations of him don’t align with the relationship you are looking for, you are only sending mixed signals, and if he isn’t willing to step up to the plate, it's time to step onto the next boy who will meet your standards.

2. He offers to pick up the bill every once in a while.

We are women. We pay for bras, tampons, makeup, hair products, fancy shaving cream, razors for our entire body, different clothes for every occasion, jewelry, the list goes on for days!

Not to mention, many of us still make $0.78 to the man’s $1.00.

If you want him to treat you to dinner instead of asking to split the bill all the time, that is not even slightly unreasonable. It doesn’t make you anti-feminist or a diva. You will offer so much in the relationship, and there are things he will want from you.

This is something he can offer you, and if he knows it is meaningful to you, he will want to do it.

3. He makes (and sticks to) scheduled plans with you.

Nope, a 1:00 am “you up?” text doesn’t count as scheduling plans. If he wants to see you, he will tell you when he is free and will be willing to work with your availability. Then, he will actually follow through on those plans.

This isn’t hard.

He has to do it with the boys. He has to do it for work. He has been maintaining relationships with friends and family his whole life, he knows how to do it. If he wants to see you, he will. You aren’t needy for wanting him to meet you halfway.

4. He offers to hold your hand in public.

If he is afraid to show that he’s with you, he doesn’t deserve you. If you reach for his hand and he pulls away because a group of girls walks by or he is afraid of “labels” then you can let go and walk the other way because somewhere, there is a guy dying to show you off by holding your hand in public.

5. He takes initiative and is willing to communicate.

You should never have to believe that if you don’t reach out, you would never hear from him. Everyone is busy, and everyone is stressed. That doesn’t excuse his lack of initiative. If he wants to spend time with you, he will make it known.

If he is busy, he will respectfully let you know that he has a lot going on and will reach out when his schedule calms down. If you are willing to put in that effort, he should be too. Relationships have to be mutual or one partner will continually be taken advantage of by the other.

Don’t excuse his lack of initiative, you deserve to know that he thinks about you without getting a text or snap from you first.

6. He respects your boundaries.

You want a committed relationship before things get physical? He should honor that.

You don’t want to go over to his place until you know he is genuinely interested in more than a physical connection? You deserve that.

It makes you uncomfortable when he refers to you as “a girl I’ve been seeing” instead of his girlfriend? You don’t need to accept that.

If he isn’t willing to respect and honor those boundaries from the beginning, you have no reason to believe he will change. Don’t give him the benefit of the doubt if he isn’t willing to respect where you draw the line.

7. He is clear about where the two of you stand and willing to define the relationship.

We’re best friends on Snapchat. We’re talking. It’s like kind of a thing. We’ve been hooking up. Whatever the lingo.

If you want him to be your boyfriend, ask him where you stand, and he is afraid of the label, you deserve better. If he isn’t ready to commit but wants to keep getting all the benefits of a girlfriend, you deserve better. These situations open up the doors for either partner to do something questionable with another person and excuse their behavior because “we weren’t officially dating.”

If he is scared of an official relationship with you, you deserve better. Maybe down the road he will be ready, but until then, he doesn’t deserve the benefits of your time, love and affection.

8. He is willing to interact with your friends and introduce you to his

Does it not seem sketchy when a guy avoids meeting your friends, or introducing you to his?

If he sees a future with you, he’s going to want his friends to like you. He will want to know that you are cool to take to gatherings, social events, and work parties. He will want his friends to approve of you, just like girls want their friends to approve of their boyfriends.

If he’s hiding you, and you feel undervalued because of it, I’m here to tell you that you aren’t overreacting.

9. He remembers important things like your favorite type of ice cream or an event you are looking forward to.

If you are investing in the little things he shares with you, it’s only fair he is just as interested in you. If you’ve told him every day for a week about your date party that you’d like him to come to and he says “oh something came up,” or “when is that again?”, he isn’t paying attention. You deserve to have someone who is willing to put in the effort and pay attention.

10. He never lets you feel like an option, but a priority

This is SO important. If he’s the boy for you, he will recognize that you aren’t disposable, but one of a kind and worth his devotion. No exceptions.