1. "We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup."
Me too, Buddy, me too. College kids eat whatever is available ... and usually what's available is something made primarily with sugar.
2. "You sit on a throne of lies"
When your professor says the test is going to be "easy if you studied."
3. Emily: "Did you sleep well last night?"
Buddy: "Great! I got a full 40 minutes"
There's no such thing as sleep in college. But if Buddy can function on only 40 minutes, so can you.
4. "I'm sorry I ruined your lives and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR."
So you ate your roommate's entire sleeve of Pringles and ordered pizza with their credit card when you came home drunk last weekend ... these things happen, and Buddy gets that.
5. "I think you're really beautiful and I feel really warm when I'm around you and my tongue swells up. "
Every girl wants someone to feel like the about her. Finding that someone in college may seem impossible, but if Buddy the Elf can find love in NYC, you can find love on campus.
6. "I'm a cotton-headed ninny muggins."
Classes can really bring you down, but remember "you're not a cotton-headed ninny muggins ... you're just ... special."
7. "You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job everybody! It's great to meet you!"An 8 a.m. can make anyone feel this enthusiastic about a sub-par cup of joe. But let's be real, in college, any cup of coffee, anywhere, anytime is the world's BEST cup of coffee.
8. Buddy: "Do you remember me?"Deb: "I do! I didn't recognize you!"
Buddy: "I know! I'm in work clothes!"
Wearing real clothes in college is hard. Putting on a pair of slacks and a blazer for an interview or meeting is completely transformative and may leave your friends wondering who you are.
9. "So good news, I saw a dog today."
By the time finals come around, random animals are pretty much all that's left to live for. Getting unnecessarily excited to see a dog is a hallmark of college.
10. "First we'll make snow angels for two hours, then we'll go ice skating, then we'll eat a whole roll of Tollhouse Cookie dough as fast as we can, and then we'll snuggle."This is what we think Christmas Break is going to be like. In all actuality, you're just going to watch Netflix for three weeks straight and quit brushing your hair.
