The saying "boys will be boys" has such a negative connotation. Nowadays, I do not picture the stereotypical boys rolling around in the mud, having wrestling matches, or playing with monster trucks. I picture boys and men sexually objectifying women.
When women of all ages walk down the street, their is always a constant threat looming. It usually begins with a whistle and ends with a "damn girl", or a "hey baby" or even a "nice ass". As ridiculous as this sounds, I can't remember the last time I walked alone and wasn't hollered at, whistled at, or was judged about the size of my butt and nothing more. Whether a man walks by me and makes a derogatory comment, drives by and whistles, or a frat boy repeatedly asks me to dance after I've said no for the eighth time, why am I made to feel bad? Why am I, the victim of this type of harassment, being blamed instead of the man who obviously lacks complete and total self control? I should be able to wear an off the shoulder shirt, without being penalized because it's "distracting". PLEASE tell me how my shoulders are going to distract you from learning about the Pythagorean theorem? How does wearing an outfit that might be considered "revealing" invite you to make comments about my body? I shouldn't have to worry about the safety of myself or my friends, because who knows how a boy who speaks like that to women is going to react if you tell him to back off? And speaking of that, how are women even supposed to respond to those comments, for concern of further disrespect or in the worst case, violence?
Men need to learn that catcalling is not a form of flattery. It is not a compliment. It does not make women feel good about themselves, and it certainly does not compensate for anything men might be lacking. They need to be taught that respecting women isn't uncool and doesn't make them any less of a man. That treating women as equals and appreciating them for more than their bodies should be a commonality, not something to be kicked aside.
On the other side of the spectrum, women need to be reassured that sexual harassment IS NOT THEIR FAULT. They are not "asking for it" by wearing a short dress or a crop top. They should not be blamed for the immature, sexist, and downright demeaning comments made by men on an everyday basis. I want all women everywhere to know that they should not be ashamed wearing something they feel good in. That they should never back down from standing up for themselves. That they are not alone. But most importantly, that they are more than what any boy makes them feel.
*If you or anyone you know has ever been the victim of sexual harassment and need a person to speak with, please call (800)-656-4673 to be connected to a trained sexual assault service provider near you*
