There just isn’t anything quite like the seasons in New England. Living here, we are extremely lucky to be able to experience all that winter, spring, summer, and fall have to offer. However, the seasons in New England don’t always play by the rules. Sometimes it’s spring in February; sometimes it’s winter in October. The only predictable thing about the seasons in New England is that they are unpredictable. Here’s winter in New England, as told by Justin Bieber’s new album, "Purpose."
1. Mark my Words
You swear you’re going to be more prepared for whatever this year’s winter has in store for you. Doesn’t happen. You promise that you won't turn your heat on until after Halloween. Also doesn’t happen. So what, you’re stuck stealing your neighbors rock salt and almost faint when the utility bill comes in?? Mark your words, you’ll do better next year.
2. I’ll Show You
Seasonal depression, you're an a**! You’re set on proving everyone wrong about post-holiday winter dread. While you try to keep it holly jolly long after the New Year, mid-January takes a toll on your spirit. Like, come on. Its dark at 3 p.m. There’s not enough time to be happy. When are the Red Sox starting up again? You’ll show ‘em next year.
3. What Do You Mean?
Like, seriously. What do you mean tomorrow’s going to be 65 degrees?! It snowed, like, YESTERDAY. You already put all your summer stuff away, doesn’t mother nature know that?! Ugh, honestly New England, what do you mean?
Sorry you ate all the cookies your cousins were suppose to decorate. Sorry you snooped around and found all your gifts. Sorry you drank four bottles of wine on Christmas Eve. Sorry you got kicked out of the Bruins game. Sorry that you threw up while shoveling out your grandparent’s driveway hungover. Is it too late now to say sorry?
5. No Sense
It don’t make no sense… that you froze your butt off walking to your car this morning and now it’s a bright and sunny 70 degrees outside. That wool sweater was perfect for 8 a.m. and now you’re melting. Awesome. New England, you make NO SENSE.
6. Where Are U Now?
So, remember all the times you walked by shovels, scrapers, and anti-freeze in Target and swore you’d grab them once the weather dropped below 50 degrees? Well, now you’re snowed in up to your doorknobs and wondering when it all went wrong. Rock salt, where are u now that we need you??
7. No Pressure
You're trying to keep your cool while driving on the Mass Pike, but a few snowflakes have people driving like there’s no rush, no pressure to get anywhere. No one can make their mind up about which exit to take, and you realize their confusion is caused by their Midwest license plate. What’s someone from the boonies doing taking a Sunday afternoon drive down the Pike?! Their driving distracts you and you hit a huge pot hole. No rush, no tire pressure.
8. Get Used to It
Eventually, you learn to love New England winter. You get used to the everchanging temperature, the unpredictable snowstorms, and the high heat bill. You learn to drive with screwed up alignment from the potholes and get used to the numbness from holding an ice coffee in January. There’s a purpose to the winter conditions in New England; to always keep you guessin’.