It's funny how love sneaks up on you. Even when you want to deny it, or you wish it was for another person, it shows itself at the most terrible times, and you know you're up for some impromptu burdens in the future. It's a feeling that many of us take for granted, and sometimes what we mistake for fascination, imagination, or obsession.
It's taken me my almost 22 years to figure it out, and it's a joke for me saying that, because I will forever be studying what love is, as do most people in their lifetimes. I think I've begun to recognize what my love for someone is, but it seems to show itself differently each time.
My last love was toxic, emotional, abusive, unhealthy, and what I felt was a necessity for my survival and sanity. My current love is Passionate, new, sweet, romantic, caring, magical, different, and the best feeling that I've felt in a long time.
I've noticed that what I've been told from a young age is true; everyone's love is different. Everyone loves differently and treats the people they love differently than others. I've slowly been attempting to stop myself from judging others relationships because I'm not them, and whatever may work for those people (or not), isn't going to work for me.
It's an amazing, scary, heart racing feeling to really feel love for someone. When people would tell me that they've never been in love, I'd find myself feeling very sad for them. I was sad that they couldn't feel what I had felt, that they couldn't feel the happiness that comes along with falling in love with someone. Once I thought about it, I realized that maybe it was good that they hadn't loved before. Maybe it was for a reason that they hadn't gone through the heartbreak, the happiness, the fights, the sex, the growing up that comes with love sometimes.
I guess what I'm saying is that love is a gift that we'll all receive at one point or another. It is a phenomenon that I don't think we'll ever figure out. It's a messy, amazing, real part of life because you can't fake your genuine love for someone. I wish I could say that love will be the best thing that happens to you, but I can't. What I can say, is that love will open up doors to parts of you that you never knew existed. It will show you how you are as a person, the things that you love, and can't stand about yourself.
Love will change your life, it does for all of us.
