How my one true love has taught me so much.

Why I'm Scared To Date Again

This is how my one love has taught me to be me.

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The reality of dating is; you either break up or get married. You either spend your nights wondering 'what if', or next to your special someone. You either find the love of your life or get heartbroken. But what happens if you experience both?

Let's get personal.

I have had one true love. I know what you're thinking, I'm so young and have no idea what's ahead of me. And you're 100% right, but that is why the thought of something new is terrifying.

After things ended with this one-of-a-kind guy, things in the dating scene seem 100% more intimidating than before. This boy I've been talking about has taught me how to love one another, how to enjoy things in the moment, and how to cherish the little things. Ever since we have gone our own ways, I have seemed to forgotten how to do these things. No, it wasn't some blowout fight, there was no drama, it's not a juicy break-up, it was simply just a break-up. But he gave me the chance to figure what I want, the type of man I deserve, and where I see myself in the future.

This is why I am scared.

The thought of putting myself out there only to be disappointed, or defeated, or broken hearted is a scary idea. When you already know what a good relationship feels like, it's hard to convince yourself to try again.

Dating is about opening yourself up to someone else, finding a connection, and trying new things. The thought of that is something I can't put myself up to. And that is OK.

Coming to terms with yourself and realizing that you aren't ready for something as emotional as dating, is a strong suit. It is a power move. It is something that a lot of people can't do. Why put yourself in a situation that you aren't ready for?

Because of this, I have become a confident, independent woman. A woman who wants the best for herself, someone who is spontaneous because there is no one to tell me 'no', and a person that can't wait to see what each day brings.

So, this is me, not putting myself out there. This is me, taking time for me. And this is me, learning from past love to find a new.

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An Appreciation Letter To My Boyfriend

I don't think I say it enough...
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To My Loving Boyfriend,

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Thank you for being supportive with everything that I want to do. Instead of trying to convince me 'no', you're encouraging me with a 'yes' or 'you got it'. Having you as my number one cheerleader is such a blessing, because I know I'll always have someone rooting for me. And you know that as much as you're cheering for me, I'm cheering for you right back. Having such immense support for one another is so important in any relationship, and I'm so lucky to have that kind of love and attention coming from you everyday.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate you more than words can write. I could probably talk for hours about how much I love you and how obsessed I am with you, but that's a little too much to put into an approximately 500 word piece. More importantly than telling you, I hope I'm able to show you everyday through my actions how much of a positive impact you have on my life. I'm certainly not the same person I was when we first started talking over two years ago, but I'm definitely a better person today than then, with a big thanks to you for that. You've helped me grow so much and I know you'll help me to improve for the better even more in the future.

I can't wait to see where life's adventures take us next. The only thing I know is that I definitely want to enjoy those adventures with you by my side. I promise to keep enjoying all of the little things that make every day with you so amazing. Thank you for the thousandth for everything that you do for me, because I don't know where I would be - or who I would be - had it not been you by my side all this time. Thank you for being my best friend, my secret keeper, and my confidante. And if I don't say it enough, always know I love you and everything that you do.

With So Much Love,

Your Very Appreciative Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Kayla Master

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41 Thank-Yous To My Boyfriend Who Stood By My Side For Three Semesters And Graduation

Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.

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These last several semesters at college, I've learned so much and I've changed so much, all because of one person. A person that came at a time when things were going downhill, and completely flipped my life around. I will never forget how terrible I felt before I met you, and how much better I am with you by my side. Truly, I don't know where I would be without you. And that's why it will always be impossible to thank you enough for everything that you have done for me.

But you do deserve to know how much of an impact you have on me.

1. Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on when I was struggling to get through this last semester.

2. Thank you for always listening to me rant about problems I was having with my friends.

3. Thank you for never getting tired of me talking about the same things over and over again.

4. Thank you for never acting like my past trauma was baggage or a burden.

5. Thank you for trying your best to understand and to be considerate of my anxiety.

6. Thank you for being patient with me when I take so long to process everything and sort out my emotions.

7. Thank you for dealing with my mood swings and intense emotions.

8. Thank you for never judging me over things I get embarrassed about.

9. Thank you for sharing your opinions with me, even when I didn't want to hear them, but I needed to hear them.

10. Thank you for opening my eyes to toxic behavior that I was blind to.

11. Thank you for always looking out for my health and well-being, and my future.

12. Thank you for helping me grow up and mature.

13. Thank you for always wanting to talk things out.

14. Thank you for making me feel important.

15. Thank you for giving me a reason to live.

16. Thank you for showing me what true love is.

17. Thank you for being my best friend and partner in life.

18. Thank you for breaking my walls down but never breaking a promise.

19. Thank you for keeping my heart safe.

20. Thank you for giving me endless reassurance.

21. Thank you for never making me worry about the fate of our relationship.

22. Thank you for always putting me first.

23. Thank you for being loyal and committed to me.

24. Thank you for all of the memories and adventures.

25. Thank you for never getting annoyed about taking photos.

26. Thank you for the best summer of my life.

27. Thank you for making college a much better experience for me.

28. Thank you for always putting a smile on my face.

29. Thank you for always catering to me and trying to make me happy.

30. Thank you for all the little favors you do for me and everything else you might think goes unnoticed (but trust me, I notice and I appreciate it so much).

31. Thank you for supporting everything that I'm passionate about.

32. Thank you for always making an effort to change.

33. Thank you for always forgiving me when I make (loads of) mistakes.

34. Thank you for being a good influence on me.

35. Thank you for being my role model and inspiring me to be more like you.

36. Thank you for the amount of time, effort, and love that you've put into our relationship.

37. Thank you for shaping my future.

38. Thank you for making me so hopeful and excited about everything that we are going to do throughout our life together.

39. Thank you for thinking that I'm worth it.

40. Thank you for wanting to get married, have kids, and spend your life with me.

41. Thank you for making my dreams come true.

Now that we've graduated, for the first time, we're dealing with the fact that we don't have a set path laid out for us. Real life is more than what we're used to. We might struggle to find jobs. Heck, we might find jobs but hate them. It might take forever to save up money. Things might not go according to how we planned them in our heads. We're going to have to juggle a bunch of different elements all at once. Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.

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