Recommended for you

Start writing a post

Lifestyle

21 Things You Know If Your Dog Is Basically A Hooman

You might be low key, but he sure as hell needs to be primped and prepped with a bowtie.

Natasha Fradkin

Aug 07, 2018

New York University

208

21 Things You Know If Your Dog Is Basically A Hooman

Natasha Fradkin

Oh, and he has an adorable attitude too.

1. Perfect hair is a must. Before a morning walk, bed head must be fixed.

2. If you’re going for more than a bathroom walk, a bowtie or other accessory is vital.

3. Excuse me, it's raining, I require a rain jacket and rain boots.

4. I know I peed on my front legs, but ummm they have to be cleaned.

5. Humidity makes my ears poofy, and I are not okay with it.

6. Speaking of ears, if I have long ears, they better not be flipped.

7. While I enjoy being primped and prepped, and bath time is lovely, I do not enjoy actually being wet.

8. The world is exciting. Very exciting.

9. Human food is required, but only to accompany puppy food.

10. Everyone in the family takes a probiotic, therefore, I do as well.

11. Speaking of human food, I eat from the table. But don't go thinking I get fed with fingers. Nope, I eat off the fork. Just like a real HOOMAN.

12. Must sleep in my own bed, and it's MY bed.

13. I can tell that you have a cut on your foot, or that you are sad, so I will lick your physical and emotional wounds.

14. Must be included in all family activities. Especially the family portraits.

15. If you're having ice cream for dessert, you bet I want a lick. Or, you know, like split it 70/30 with me.

16. When dinner is called, I'm the first one at the table. I might as well have a high chair there.

17. While poofy ears are NOT okay, at least when its from humidity, a floofy tail is always appreciated.

18. I pick out a new bowtie every morning, and makes sure everyone sees it.

19. Don't you dare walk past me in the street without acknowledging me.

20. I actually gets excited about new outfits. And forget about walking into Petco without a new toy or sweater.

21. Will only go to bed after a nap with everyone on the couch after dinner. I must be carried to bed like a baby, tucked in with my blanket, and told that you love me.

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Smith College

75555

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

waitlisted

Swoon

Navigating the Talking Stage: 21 Essential Questions to Ask for Connection

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

National Writers Society

142176

a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less

single life

Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

Marist College

47173

loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets

StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less

Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

University of Oklahoma

977671

Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat

Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less

family and friends

Recommended for you

21 Things You Know If Your Dog Is Basically A Hooman

You might be low key, but he sure as hell needs to be primped and prepped with a bowtie.

1. Perfect hair is a must. Before a morning walk, bed head must be fixed.

2. If you’re going for more than a bathroom walk, a bowtie or other accessory is vital.

3. Excuse me, it's raining, I require a rain jacket and rain boots.

4. I know I peed on my front legs, but ummm they have to be cleaned.

5. Humidity makes my ears poofy, and I are not okay with it.

6. Speaking of ears, if I have long ears, they better not be flipped.

7. While I enjoy being primped and prepped, and bath time is lovely, I do not enjoy actually being wet.

8. The world is exciting. Very exciting.

9. Human food is required, but only to accompany puppy food.

10. Everyone in the family takes a probiotic, therefore, I do as well.

11. Speaking of human food, I eat from the table. But don't go thinking I get fed with fingers. Nope, I eat off the fork. Just like a real HOOMAN.

12. Must sleep in my own bed, and it's MY bed.

13. I can tell that you have a cut on your foot, or that you are sad, so I will lick your physical and emotional wounds.

14. Must be included in all family activities. Especially the family portraits.

15. If you're having ice cream for dessert, you bet I want a lick. Or, you know, like split it 70/30 with me.

16. When dinner is called, I'm the first one at the table. I might as well have a high chair there.

17. While poofy ears are NOT okay, at least when its from humidity, a floofy tail is always appreciated.

18. I pick out a new bowtie every morning, and makes sure everyone sees it.

19. Don't you dare walk past me in the street without acknowledging me.

20. I actually gets excited about new outfits. And forget about walking into Petco without a new toy or sweater.

21. Will only go to bed after a nap with everyone on the couch after dinner. I must be carried to bed like a baby, tucked in with my blanket, and told that you love me.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?

13. What is your ideal date night?

14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?

15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Can you describe yourself in three words?

18. What makes you the most nervous in life?

19. What's the best gift you have ever received?

20. What do you do to relax/have fun?

21. What are your priorities at this phase of your life?

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

Ingredients

Instructions

Ingredients

Instructions

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

A bad day at the lake is still better than a good day not at the lake.

You know the best beaches and coves to go to.

You have no patience for the guy who can't back his trailer into the water right.

Doing the friendly wave to every boat you pass.

The cooler is always packed, mostly with beer.

Giving the idiot who goes 30 in a "No Wake Zone" a piece of your mind.

You have no problem with peeing in the water.

You know the frustration of getting your anchor stuck.

Watching in awe at the bigger, better boats that pass by.

Knowing any swimsuit that you own with white in it is best left for the pool or the ocean.

The momentary fear for your life as you get launched from the tube.

You're able to go to the restaurants by the water wearing minimal clothing.

Having unexpected problems with your boat.

Having a name for your boat unique to you and your life.

There's no better place you'd rather be in the summer.

Trending Topics

Top Creators

Trending Stories

Best of Lifestyle

Subscribe to our
Newsletter