I will try my best too not make this such a sob story. I honestly do not want this is to be sappy or too emotional. I want it to truly be about what an absent father teaches his young daughter. How I have grown into a young women without a father figure and who to properly thank for that.
The first thing my dad taught me was how to stand on my own two feet. While I still had a support system surrounding me, the absence of my father made me grow up in ways that some kids do not have to. I learned how to do things on my own, do manual labor by myself. My mom made sure to teacher me these life skills so that I would not need to rely on a man for an oil change.
My dad taught me that life is not as simple as you think it is. At a young age most things are black and white and it is not super complicated. The older you get the more you realize that like can get hectic and crazy. Going from a loving family to a so called "broken one" is the perfect example of not having a black and white world. Life will throw you into the real world without a moments notice.
A big thing I was taught was it takes a long time to forgive someone who hurts you this bad. It took me over six years to properly speak to the man who brought me into this world. Even then the conversations were strained and few and far in between. I had to teach myself that type of forgiveness and apply it to my relationship with him. I was taught that forgiveness really isn't for the other person but for you. Healing takes time, and so does the courage to reach out hoping not to get burned again.
I was taught what real love was. This is something that he did not teach me; I was taught this by the people who stayed. My mom and family taught me the unconditional love that was taken away from the other parent. I learned how a person should be treated in a marriage, I learned how a child should be spoken to, I learned from my dad's mistakes and my mom's victories.
I was taught how an absent parent can be a huge blessing but a curse. You can't help but wonder what you are missing out on because it was never there for you. You wonder if your milestones would be any different if they were there with you. You can't help but wonder how your life would be different if they chose to stay in your life. It truly is a bittersweet feeling, because you know that you are loved by many people but sometimes all you can think about is that one person who doesn't.
I was taught how I want to raise my kids one day. I was taught how I wanted to be treated and what I will not put up with in a marriage. I was taught heartbreak as a young age. I was also taught to be braver than I felt, and forgive those who didn't even ask for it.