Kindness. Something I would like to believe all people would like to have, but that might just be wishful and naive thinking. I can say for me, at least, that I aspire to be kind. When I give or experience kindness, it feels like absolute bliss. It's not like any other feeling, and I want to feel it over and over again. So, selfishly, I choose to be kind so I can continually feel this addictive feeling, but selflessly, I choose to be kind so I can share that same feeling with others. I want them to feel the same bliss that I do.
When talking about kindness, most people think of gestures and actions that are meant to brighten someone's day like hand-written notes of affirmation and adoration, surprising someone with their favorite food just because, or holding someone when they're crying. These all represent kindness to a degree, but there is so much more to kindness. Kindness can be bright, charming, even euphoric, but it also can be unexplainably and unexpectedly painful and hurtful.
Kindness isn't always sunshine and happiness, it can bring bliss and pure joy, but truthfully being kind sometimes means doing the hard thing. Being kind means looking out for another person's needs over their feelings, doing what's best for them when it means it could hurt them sometimes.
Something kind but painful was not encouraging or supporting my best friend in her relationship with her ex-boyfriend. I care about her feelings, and I want her to be happy, but the relationship was toxic, so I watched my best friend get her heart broken and helped pick up the remaining pieces.
Something kind but hurtful was ending friendships with people I deeply cared about because I was not good for them. I was hurting them, and once I saw that I realized I needed time away to fix myself before I could go back to them. While I was losing some of my closest friends, I couldn't stand the thought of hurting the people I loved any longer.
Something unexpectedly kind was yelling at three of the star football players in front of the entire football team and their coach because they had been bullying my best friend. I was not kind to them. I was being kind to my best friend. I didn't care about humiliating them or teaching them the things they need to know. I was protecting my best friend, and I was protecting her heart because that meant more to me than any silly boys' reputation. In the end and while it was not my intention, in retrospect, teaching them that they need to have respect for others and that they shouldn't belittle others for the sake of a joke, that was kind. They'll remember how they felt, they'll remember what someone did to them because of their actions, and hopefully, they've changed their behavior.
Ultimately, doing something for someone and looking out for their well-being and benefit is the epitome of kindness.
Kindness comes in different shapes and forms, and it makes people feel and do all sorts of things. Kindness can be so many good things, but kindness is not limited to only the good things.
