I’ll admit it: I am a sucker for cheesy over-the-top romantic Jane Austen novels. I love reading all of her novels even though after a while, you know how each one will end. I love the idea of characters falling in love with their best friends or finding love in the most unlikely places. So, here I’ve compiled a list of lessons I learned from being a self-acclaimed Austenian.

1. Don’t make a premature judgement

Right, Lizzie! Your first impression of someone often is not the right idea of them. Let’s face it, we are all guilty of it because we have all made such an assumption at some point in our lives. However, this can cause problems later on and can even prevent us from forming relationships. Elizabeth Bennett was wrong about Mr. Darcy for the most part in Pride and Prejudice.

2. Don’t meddle in other people’s relationships

You heard it, Emma! When Emma attempted to play matchmaker for her friends, she ended up breaking many hearts and getting hurt herself. So, it’s best to stay out of other people’s love lives unless you know for sure their feelings are mutual.

3. Your family doesn’t always know the best for you

The Bennetts and the Dashwoods, please let your daughters make decisions for themselves and stop making a fool of them when you go to elegant balls.

4. Money doesn’t bring happiness

We’ve seen it with Mr. Darcy, Elinor Dashwood, Emma Woodhouse, among many others. You can have all of the magnificent mansions with luxurious accessories but you will still long for something that makes you happy which material possessions can’t satisfy.

5. It’s okay to be nervous and shaky

Mr. Darcy was very nervous when he professed his love to Lizzie. Yet, we still love him so you’ll be fine even if you are a little nervous.

6. Don’t criticize your love interest’s family

Following up on my previous point, Mr. Darcy stated that Lizzie’s family was extremely mannerless and embarrassing when he confessed that he loved her. Pro-tip: if you are trying to win someone’s heart, don’t do that.

7. Sisterly love and feminine bonding is very important

In all of her books, the female characters remained united and supported each other through challenging times. Some examples include Lizzie and Jane Bennett, Elinor and Marianne Dashwood, and Emma Woodhouse and Miss Taylor. These women supported each other when their families and love interests left them astray.

8. Don’t judge a person based on your first encounter with them

First encounters are often awkward and meaningless so just don’t make a solid judgement out of it.

9. Keep an Open Mind

This one’s related to my previous point. Always be willing to learn more about someone and something. Don’t let an insignificant thing create a solid judgement. Emma Woodhouse was guilty of this one when she didn’t let Miss Harriet Smith pursue Robert Martin.

10. Sometimes you find love in the most unlikely place

Elizabeth Bennett detested Mr. Darcy and yet, she ended up loving him. Emma Woodhouse considered herself above love and marriage until she realized she had loved her friend, Mr. Knightly all along. So, sometimes you will be pleasantly surprised to find love where you had never thought you would find it.