What It's Like To Date A Police Officer

What It's Like To Date A Police Officer

Because everyone loves a man in uniform
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My boyfriend of 5 years became a police officer about 6 months ago. Before that, he had been a volunteer firefighter for as long as we'd been together. The things I'm about to talk about will not make sense or be understood by girls/women who do not have a significant other in law enforcement. Though some of these things likely apply to men of other professions, most of them are especially applicable to men in the police force. Here are some of the pros and cons of dating a man in law enforcement, as requested by my very own policeman.

1. Everyone loves a man in uniform.

This is just the truth. Police officers, firefighters, soldiers, whatever. There's just something about a man with a little authority. A man in uniform is one of the biggest turn-ons for us women. There's something sexy about your man out there protecting people, even if it means a little time spent away from you. Also, we like our men in uniform because it means they know how to follow orders. (I'm kidding...kind of)

2. Plans are never set in stone.

It doesn't matter if it's Valentine's Day or your birthday or a special date night. No plans are ever set in stone. You never know when your man is going to get called away to help out at work. You can be on the way to go eat dinner with your man and he'll have to cancel because of work. Unfortunately, this is usually unavoidable. I know it sucks, but you'll feel selfish if you complain. I promise. Besides, I'm sure he'd rather be with you than going to work anyway.

3. You'll always feel safe.

This is one of the biggest perks of dating a police officer. When you hear a strange noise late at night, you can send your man to check it out. It is his job, after all. You will never feel safer than you will when you're with a police officer. Though they are not invincible, they're about the closest thing to it that I've been able to find!

4. Sometimes, work comes home with them.

You have to realize that the job they're doing is not an easy one. They deal with things every day that no person should ever have to deal with. They deal with criminals, child abusers, crazy people, and everyone else that society refuses to deal with. They put their lives on the line every single day. Sometimes, it's hard for them to leave all of these things at work. If they come home sad or mad or tired, you should just let them know that you are there for them if they feel like talking. And if they don't feel like talking about it, be there to sit quietly with them until they feel better. The most crucial part of this is to be understanding. You never know what they went through that day or what they saw.

5. You will learn all of the codes.

You've probably listened to the scanner so much that you feel like you could get on one of those radios and communicate on your own. You've learned what all the codes mean. You've probably even learned the names of the dispatchers and can tell their voices apart. When your significant other is at work, I bet you sit there and listen to the scanner, waiting to hear their voice. This is just one of the things that comes with the territory. Who knows? Maybe one day all this knowledge will prove to be very useful to you.

6. They don't always get holidays off of work.

Safety takes no holiday. Safety is something that law enforcement officers provide 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. They don't always get holidays off to spend time with their families or significant others. This may mean that they won't be home to celebrate Christmas morning or Thanksgiving or New Year's Eve. You both would prefer them to be at home with you, but duty calls.

7. You'll always be worried about him.

Once again, law enforcement officers don't have an easy job. These days, being a cop is especially dangerous. It hurts to think about it, but there are people out there who would hurt your police officer if given the chance. It is never easy to watch them leave to go to work. You'll get worried when they don't text you back during the day, even though you know in the back of your mind that they're just busy. You'll be worried when they don't get off work and come home right on time, but they probably just got hung up doing something. You'll be worried about everything. This is another thing that comes with the territory. You just have to hope and pray that your man knows what he's doing and that he's going to protect himself while he's protecting others. The only thing you can do is tell him you love him every chance you get.

8. You'll make lots of "cop" friends.

As your significant other makes friends at work, they'll also become your friends. You'll get to know them and their wives or girlfriends, and it'll make you feel like you're a part of the force, too. The good part about this is that you know they're good guys. And if they pull you over someday, maybe you'll even be able to talk yourself out of getting a ticket. It's worth a shot, anyway.

There are lots of good things about dating a police officer. There are a few bad things, too. The good things are great. The bad things are unavoidable. However, how great is it to know that the person you love is so selfless that they willingly put their life on the line for people they don't even know? Though it sucks sometimes, the only thing you can do is be proud of them and let them know how much you love them. To my own deputy sheriff, I'm proud of you and I love you.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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An Open Letter to the Person Who Still Uses the "R Word"

Your negative associations are slowly poisoning the true meaning of an incredibly beautiful, exclusive word.
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What do you mean you didn't “mean it like that?" You said it.

People don't say things just for the hell of it. It has one definition. Merriam-Webster defines it as, "To be less advanced in mental, physical or social development than is usual for one's age."

So, when you were “retarded drunk" this past weekend, as you claim, were you diagnosed with a physical or mental disability?

When you called your friend “retarded," did you realize that you were actually falsely labeling them as handicapped?

Don't correct yourself with words like “stupid," “dumb," or “ignorant." when I call you out. Sharpen your vocabulary a little more and broaden your horizons, because I promise you that if people with disabilities could banish that word forever, they would.

Especially when people associate it with drunks, bad decisions, idiotic statements, their enemies and other meaningless issues. Oh trust me, they are way more than that.

I'm not quite sure if you have had your eyes opened as to what a disabled person is capable of, but let me go ahead and lay it out there for you. My best friend has Down Syndrome, and when I tell people that their initial reaction is, “Oh that is so nice of you! You are so selfless to hang out with her."

Well, thanks for the compliment, but she is a person. A living, breathing, normal girl who has feelings, friends, thousands of abilities, knowledge, and compassion out the wazoo.

She listens better than anyone I know, she gets more excited to see me than anyone I know, and she works harder at her hobbies, school, work, and sports than anyone I know. She attends a private school, is a member of the swim team, has won multiple events in the Special Olympics, is in the school choir, and could quite possibly be the most popular girl at her school!

So yes, I would love to take your compliment, but please realize that most people who are labeled as “disabled" are actually more “able" than normal people. I hang out with her because she is one of the people who has so effortlessly taught me simplicity, gratitude, strength, faith, passion, love, genuine happiness and so much more.

Speaking for the people who cannot defend themselves: choose a new word.

The trend has gone out of style, just like smoking cigarettes or not wearing your seat belt. It is poisonous, it is ignorant, and it is low class.

As I explained above, most people with disabilities are actually more capable than a normal human because of their advantageous ways of making peoples' days and unknowingly changing lives. Hang out with a handicapped person, even if it is just for a day. I can one hundred percent guarantee you will bite your tongue next time you go to use the term out of context.

Hopefully you at least think of my friend, who in my book is a hero, a champion and an overcomer. Don't use the “R Word". You are way too good for that. Stand up and correct someone today.

Cover Image Credit: Kaitlin Murray

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Dear America, We Can Step Forward As A Country If We Stop Believing That Only One Belief Is Valid

It's time to promote unity and emphasize our commonalities because only through unity can we step forward as a country.

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Dear America,

2018 was a year of political strife and conflict. The left and the right fought constantly. Republicans and Democrats blamed each other for the tiniest mistakes, and there were only a small number of successful bipartisan deals. Politicians and citizens alike seemed more concerned with sticking to party platforms, even ones they truly didn't believe in, rather than compromising with the other side to improve our society.Yet all this name-calling and hatred — what does it do in the end? What does it accomplish?

We've only seen an increased polarization of American politics and an expanded hostility towards "the other side." We don't consider the well-being of each and every person in America and the bettering of our society, or the building of a stronger world for our children and grandchildren.

We spend so much time insulting each other's political beliefs that we forget probably the most important fact that links us all together: We are all human. We all share the same basic needs, the same struggles, the same moments of happiness and sadness.

And yet we are willing to put our similarities aside and only focus on our differences. We are willing to thrust ourselves into the deep anger and loathing that comes in attacking those different from us. We are willing to parry insults behind the safety of a phone screen and forget all about what makes us alike. And we are willing to gloss over the fact that we have more similarities than differences.

SEE ALSO: Dear Trump, Thanks For Transforming Me Into A Responsible, Educated Citizen

Yes, political beliefs make a person. Political beliefs define the values, ideas and thoughts of a person. But sometimes, we have to reach over those beliefs, as hard as that may be, and focus on the bigger picture at hand. What will insulting someone because of those beliefs do? It definitely won't change their views or make them see things from your point of view.

It's sad and frustrating that this endless fighting doesn't even occur between two countries or two governments or two nation-states. Instead, we see arguments and strife between two family members, two neighbors or even two strangers, all living in the same community and under the same government, all sharing more similarities than differences.

We need to stop focusing so much on singular ideas. We need to stop believing in the close-minded idea that only one thought is the best thought. And instead of wasting energy trying to change other's opinions, we need to use that energy and time to promote unity and emphasize our commonalities.

These past few years have truly divided America. Let's make 2019 a year of unity, because only through unity can we step forward as a country.

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