10 Unspoken Rules Of College Bathrooms We All Need To Follow

10 Unspoken Rules Of College Bathrooms We All Need To Follow

We all abide by bathroom decorum; we all just know the rules and the secret joys of the bathroom.
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There is a bathroom decorum.

We all abide by it, we all just know the rules and the secret joys of the bathroom. Today, I went into my school's bathroom and did my business. When I came out, I was standing by the sink, inspecting my face.

Then the worst things happened. My professor walked in. I felt panic because I had to decide whether to break the bathroom rule of not speaking in the bathroom or go rogue and start a conversation. As I stood there, I contemplated my decisions and the life-altering effects it could have. Luckily, she broke the rule first and said hi, so I was spared making that awful choice of...



1. To talk, or not to talk.

That is the question. But really, please don't talk to me. Bathroom = Quiet Time

2. Being alone in the bathroom is heaven.

When you can poo in peace, there is no greater feeling. We all hate waiting for people to leave...or that one straggler who just won't leave. Or worse yet...the her poo-er waiting for you to leave. It's a battle of the poo-ers, between two people, one of which who will suck it up and leave because they can't handle the tension in the air.

3. Pooping in public quietly.

When you aren't alone, and you have one of those legendary quiet poops. It's truly amazing.

4. The silent judgment of not washing hands...

Did you or didn't you? Did I? I used sanitizer like an hour ago...that counts right? Don't judge me.

5. Pretending you didn't hear that person fart.

When you are in the stall next door and you pretend you didn't hear that release of butt air.

6. Pretending you didn't hear them do anything.

Whether it's awkward grunting or their sporadic peeing...you keep that poker face when you meet at the sink.

7. The gossip you overhear in the bathroom is legendary.

The bathroom is the place for getting the best gossip. "Say what? Stacy did what? Stacy did WHO!?

8. ALWAYS have trashcans in the stall for the women's bathroom.

Come on, that's against the code, y'all. You know girls need to use the trash, without doing the tampon walk of shame. We already hide them up our shirt on the way to the bathroom, don't make us hide them on the way out too.

9. Sitting on the toilet to kill class time.

We all sit on our phone and chill in their on Facebook for an extra couple minutes.

10. When you see a person you know in the bathroom and you have a shy bladder.

It's the terrible moment when you think about rain, water dripping, rivers and literally nothing happens. You'll beg to pee but that shy bladder just won't allow it until the bathroom is empty...or until someone turns on the air dryer.

I think we all can relate to these bathroom troubles and blessings.


Cover Image Credit: Lucas Pimenta

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Yes, I Had A Stroke And I'm Only 20

Sometimes bad things happen to good people.
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Recently, I read an article on Cosmo that was written by a woman that had a stroke at the ripe old age of 23. For those of you who don't know, that really doesn't happen. Young people don't have strokes. Some do, but it's so incredibly uncommon that it rarely crosses most people's minds. Her piece was really moving, and I related a lot -- because I had a stroke at 20.

It started as a simple headache. I didn't think much of it because I get headaches pretty often. At the time, I worked for my parents, and I texted my mom to tell her that I'd be late to work because of the pain. I had never experienced a headache like that, but I figured it still wasn't something to worry about. I went about my normal routine, and it steadily got worse. It got to the point that I literally threw up from the pain. My mom told me to take some Tylenol, but I couldn't get to our kitchen. I figured that since I was already in the bathroom, I would just take a shower and hope that the hot steam would relax my muscles, and get rid of my headache. So I turned the water on in the shower, and I waited for it to get hot.

At this point, I was sweating. I've never been that warm in my life. My head was still killing me. I was sitting on the floor of the bathroom, trying to at least cope with the pain. Finally, I decided that I needed to go to the hospital. I picked up my phone to call 911, but I couldn't see the screen. I couldn't read anything. I laid down on the floor and tried to swipe from the lock screen to the emergency call screen, but I couldn't even manage that. My fine motor skills were completely gone. My fingers wouldn't cooperate, even though I knew what buttons needed to be pressed. Instead of swiping to the emergency call screen, I threw my phone across the room. "Okay," I thought, "Large muscle groups are working. Small ones are not".

I tried getting up. That also wasn't happening. I was so unstable that I couldn't stay standing. I tried turning off the running water of the shower, but couldn't move the faucet. Eventually, I gave up on trying to move anywhere. "At what point do I just give up and lie on the floor until someone finds me?" That was the point. I ended up lying on the floor for two hours until my dad came home and found me.

During that two hours, I couldn't hear. My ears were roaring, not even ringing. I tried to yell, but I couldn't form a sentence. I was simply stuck, and couldn't do anything about it. I still had no idea what was going on.

When the ambulance finally got there, they put me on a stretcher and loaded me into the back. "Are you afraid of needles or anything?" asked one EMT. "Terrified," I responded, and she started an IV without hesitation. To this day, I don't know if that word actually came out of my mouth, but I'm so glad she started the IV. She started pumping pain medicine, but it didn't seem to be doing anything.

We got to the hospital, and the doctors there were going to treat me for a migraine and send me on my merry way. This was obviously not a migraine. When I could finally speak again, they kept asking if I was prone to migraines. "I've never had a migraine in my whole life," I would say. "Do you do any drugs?" they would ask. "No," I repeated over and over. At this point, I was fading in and out of consciousness, probably from the pain or the pain medicine.

At one point, I heard the doctors say that they couldn't handle whatever was wrong with me at our local hospital and that I would need to be flown somewhere. They decided on University of Maryland in Baltimore. My parents asked if I wanted them to wait with me or start driving, so I had them leave.

The helicopter arrived soon after, and I was loaded into it. 45 minutes later, I was in Baltimore. That was the last thing I remember. The next thing I remember was being in the hospital two weeks later. I had a drain in my head, a central port, and an IV. I honestly didn't know what had happened to me.

As it turns out, I was born with a blood vessel malformation called an AVM. Blood vessels and arteries are supposed to pass blood to one another smoothly, and mine simply weren't. I basically had a knot of blood vessels in my brain that had swelled and almost burst. There was fluid in my brain that wouldn't drain, which was why my head still hurt so bad. The doctors couldn't see through the blood and fluid to operate, so they were simply monitoring me at that point.

When they could finally see, they went in to embolize my aneurysm and try to kill the AVM. After a successful procedure, my headache was finally starting to subside. It had gone from a 10 on the pain scale (which I don't remember), to a 6 (which was when I had started to be conscious), and then down to a 2.

I went to rehab after I was discharged from the hospital, I went to rehab. There, I learned simple things like how to walk and balance, and we tested my fine motor skills to make sure that I could still play the flute. Rehab was both physically and emotionally difficult. I was constantly exhausted.

I still have a few lingering issues from the whole ordeal. I have a tremor in one hand, and I'm mostly deaf in one ear. I still get headaches sometimes, but that's just my brain getting used to regular blood flow. I sleep a lot and slur my words as I get tired. While I still have a few deficits, I'm lucky to even be alive.

Cover Image Credit: Neve McClymont

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10 Questions I Have For Colton Underwood Before His Season Of 'The Bachelor'

Bachelor Nation clearly wanted Jason or Blake instead... will Colton be able please us?

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Finding out that Colton Underwood is going to be the next bachelor didn't come as a shock to Bachelor Nation after he ended his relationship with Tia on "Bachelor in Paradise" and we were set to find out the new bachelor the following day. The majority of us wanted Jason or Blake to be the next Bachelor, so will Colton be able to please us?

1. Are you really ready to find love and get married?

From the way you were blubbering about Becca when she came to paradise and your lack of ability to commit to Tia for such a long time, it doesn't seem like you're ready for a serious relationship.

2. What are you going to do when it's time to go to the fantasy suites?

Obviously, you're a virgin. Are you planning on losing your virginity to a woman or women you've only been dating for a few weeks?

3. Aren't you somewhat young to be the bachelor?

A lot of our previous Bachelors have been around 10 years older, giving them more experiences and opportunities to find love before having their own season. Twenty-six is young to get married, especially given such a shaky dating history.

4. Can you handle the pressure?

Every Bachelor/Bachelorette breaks down at least once during their season. Will you let your emotions get the best of you?

5. How is this going to impact the Colton Underwood Legacy Foundation?

Your support for Cystic Fibrosis is touching and being the bachelor can serve as an opportunity for it to grow even more. Are you going to continue supporting this cause or will you let your fame get in the way?

6. Are you over Becca yet?

Enough said.

7. What was wrong with your relationship with Tia?

C'mon. You were meant to be together. You loved her. She loved you. You should have gotten engaged at the end of Paradise.

8. Are you going to be able to carry out conversations with 30 women about topics other than your virginity, Becca, and Tia?

I honestly don't think I've heard you talk about anything else.

9. Are you going to pull an Arie?

You dating history proves that you don't know what you want. How are you going to pick a woman you want to spend the rest of your life with?

10. WHY AREN'T YOU JASON OR BLAKE?

No offense, but Bachelor Nation didn't want you to be the next Bachelor.

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