Becoming More Comfortable In Your Own Body | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

I Felt Uncomfortable In My Own Skin And It Felt Like It Was My Own Fault

Keeping a smile on my face through thick in thin is easier then fighting the internal struggle I have fought for the past 14 years.

30
I Felt Uncomfortable In My Own Skin And It Felt Like It Was My Own Fault

It starts out as the typical "I was bullied" story up until I asked my teacher for help and then my parents tried to help me. It was the adults that hurt me more than the other bullies.

I went to a school near where I used to live, a mile away from where I used to live, Sandy Grove Elementary, and it was hell. I was badly bullied and came to hate adults, teachers, and anyone with even a little authority over me. I thought I was too weak to do anything but it turns out that it was another way: the adults, teachers, and school staff were too weak to protect me (they didn't even try).

My mother went to the vice principal at the time because the Principle was like a ghost and every time my mom tried to talk to him, he was "busy." It was really laughable. Anyway, when my mom was meeting with the Vice-Principle, I was outside the room and she said and I [roughly] quote: "Unfortunately there is a student every year that is the target of bullying because of how they look, she has become the target. There is nothing we can do other than separate her from everyone."

Do you know how much that destroys a kid self-confidence? I was devastated. My mom home-schooled me for a year and that year severely damaged me. I constantly refused to leave the house other than to go to the store and I guess that's how I developed my reclusive-ness and reluctance to go outside.

To this day, I pretend to be okay with my weight and how I look to people but I desperately want to be able to wear crop tops, shorts, and form-fitting clothes without having to constantly be aware of the stares around me and the anxiety I feel when I step out in public. (Sometimes the anxiety gets to be too much and even get sick from it, which is the worse.)

Since starting University last year, I have become a little more accepting of myself but fear and anxiety lurks in my heart. I fear the stares, the glances, the whispers, the everything it is about being in public, surrounded by strangers. Thanks to University, I have been able to roll my pants up a little and recently I was able to accept skirts as an alternative to pants and even want to wear skirts out of pure love of the look of it and no longer being ashamed of my lowers legs. It took a year for me to be able to accept my lower legs so until I am able to accept everything I won't stop being uncomfortable.

The article should end with an "I love who I am in my own skin" type phrase but in all honesty, I am far from truthfully saying that but I can tell you that I really hope I am able to say that in the near future.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

505
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

447028
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

20271
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Moana's Top 10 Life Tips

"Moana" is filled with life lessons that involve far more than finding true love as many other Disney movies do.

43600
Animated image of a woman with long dark hair and tattoos
StableDiffusion

1. It's easy to be fooled by shiny things.

Digital image of shiny gemstones in cased in gold. shiny things StableDiffusion

Tamatoa created a liar filled with shiny things simply for the purpose of tricking fish to enter and become his food. He too experiences a lesson in how easy it is to be tricked by shiny things when Moana distracts him by covering herself in glowing algae so Maui can grab his hook.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments