Twas the night before finals and all through the dorm,

it was so quiet, much more than the norm.

Our suite-mates stopped screaming, not a word to be said,

as my roommate and I reeled with exam-related dread.

My textbooks were ruffled, their pages askew,

I still had an essay and two articles due.

To-go boxes were stacked, the room was a mess,

I'd worn the same sweatpants for days 'cause I was simply too stressed.

Then out in the parking lot arose such a sound,

I stopped typing and groaned, "Oh great, what now?"

Away to the window, I flew like a flash,

joined by my roommate who was ready to crash.

Then what to my wondering eyes should appear,

but some wasted frat guys with a keg full of beer!

Trap music blared from their glossy black car,

so loud I could feel the bass from afar.

Under the light of a lamp, but the cover of night,

Their outfits were really a comical sight.

Two wore lederhosen, striped stockings to boot,

And the other wore an unbuttoned Santa suit.

He said, "Forget finals, let's party.

We can go all night!

I'll get some more beer,

it'll be totally tight."

We were laughing so hard that we needed a drink,

so we walked to the kitchen and got some from the sink.

Was "Santa" still out there? We just had to see,

but oh God...oh no...we forgot the room key.

Our laptops were in there, and our cellphones too,

our suite-mates were sleeping, so what could we do?

Then I had an idea so bright and so quick

that I knew in an instant this must do the trick!

We crept down the hall and woke the RA,

who clearly had shared in our taxing day.

Her bathrobe hung open, her cheeks were bright red,

all visions of sugarplums abandoned her head.

But she unlocked our room and said to call it a night,

But I wasn't done yet, at least, not quite.

I could write in the morning, run my flashcards, too,

but roommate and I had one thing left to do.

We peered out the window before the guys drove away,

"Santa" and the elves slammed the doors on their sleigh.

He yelled out the window as the car peeled out of sight,

"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good --"