Last year was my first year in college, and it showed. I took things for grated that I shouldn't have, my grades fluctuated, and I changed for better and for worse. As a freshman the feeling of being overwhelmed is totally normal. When you look online, they tell you the same cliché things: go to class, get involved, and get free stuff whenever possible. But when I came to UCF I felt like something was wrong with me because I didn't do those things, and it took me all year to realize, those cliché motivators are not catered for everyone.

When I was in high school, I was too involved. I was an officer of almost every club I was in, and I was in about 9 organizations (not including sports and extra curriculars). I was a speaker for my school's recruiting, and all the staff knew me. Right before graduating I remember saying "UCF has so many clubs, I'm going to do great things," and then I graduated and moved up.

Something they don't tell you online, being involuntarily alone sucks.

I hit an all time low, crying all the time, missing my family, and sequestering myself to my room. This went on for about two weeks out of the six that summer semesters have. I was seriously considering going home, and couldn't understand people who were going out and having fun - I felt like something was wrong with me.

To any incoming freshman: you will make friends. even if it seems bleak, even if you only make one, it'll happen. When it happened to me and I made a friend, I thought that this was going to be what I needed to get my head in the game.

But time went on, and clubs had meetings and I couldn't find myself going. I could see my grades dropping too, even though I was constantly studying and taking notes. All of the things going on around me, on top of getting acclimated to living alone, was too fast paced for me. UCF or colleges in general don't slow down for freshman.

When I walked onto the packed campus in Fall semester the Stephen Crane poem "A Man Said To The Universe" played on repeat in my head. Being 18 surrounded by adults averaging their mid-twenties is extremely intimidating; the hustle and bustle of this huge campus is enough to send someone running the opposite direction. I felt so small.

For the first year of college I did nothing but sit in my room and wallow in self pity for not getting as involved as I wanted to be. I tried putting myself out there and attempted to get involved, but it was so hard to make friends, so many clubs were left behind.

In my spring semester I felt more determined to get out of my shell and put myself in smaller classroom settings, took more classes, tried keeping up with friends, and getting involved. All I did was bury myself in work that I wasn't ready to tackle, and started taking medication that made me lethargic and gain weight. I was at an all time low, thinking no one understood my position.

As a freshman you don't utilize all the services schools offer to you, mainly because you don't know. UCF makes us listen to all of them during our orientation, but let's be honest, we don't take it seriously. I wish I had taken advantage of the opportunities and spoke with someone, because by the end of spring semester I was worse than I had been when I first arrived.

The extra classes had proven too much for me so my GPA dropped, I had gained weight so my self esteem dropped, I hadn't joined any clubs so my hopes dropped.

When I went back home after concluding my freshman year, I looked at the mess I had left behind and I realized, freshman year is not it. Freshman year is meant to make mistakes, find what classes your comfortable with, and being lost. But Freshman year was over for me, and I made a promise to myself that I would grow and learn from the mistakes.

Now I am going to nationals for a mock trial team, getting inducted into a Pre-Law fraternity, and I have a job. Never fear freshman, we've all been there and I promise theres a light at the end of the tunnel.