Dear everyone,
We have a little over a week until December, and although I completely understand the whole hype about Black Friday, the Christmas month, and the continuous wholehearted Christmas spirit all the way up until New Year's Eve.
For the love of God, it is November, please stop.
Just freaking stop.
I am not usually one to slaughter on someone's holiday spirit, but after working retail for two years and being a continuous part of the seasonal work crowd. I can easily affirm that "All I Want for Christmas" are my trigger words and Mariah Carrey is my trigger singer.
Imagine working a 6-hour shift and you're halfway done, only one more hour till break and with two more after you'll be free. Your folding technique is perfect, and the old pile of tossed around jeans are all neatly stacked. So perfect that, you've got to take a picture. As you reach towards your back pocket to pull out your phone an elderly lady marches straight up to your jeans. Before she can touch the first pile, you react quickly,
"Oh! I can help you, what size do you need?" you say in a voice so sweet you could vomit cotton candy.
"No." She replies bluntly as she rips apart your pile, tossing denim everywhere: on the floor, onto other racks, and mixed into other piles. In your silent horror, she effortlessly ruins your great achievement as she ransacks the entire table. Underneath the massacre of sky, indigo, and whitewashed blues, she grasps one single pair of jeans and pulls it away from the crime only you have born witness to.
"I've got it," she says emotionless and walks towards the changing rooms. As you fall to your knees, ready to cry as all your hopes and dreams are slashed apart. Will she buy them? Or will she throw them back onto the pile? You wonder as your ears prick up to the melody of a symphony you've heard for the fifth cheddar chucking time this shift,
" BABY, ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOUUUUUU. YOOOUUUUU BABY."
So yeah, in conclusion, y'all wait 365 days for your birthday and other holidays, so you can easily wait an extra week to play Christmas music.
P.S, please be nice to retailers this season, it's our holiday too.