Unsure, afraid and apprehensive. Three words to describe that freshman girl sitting in the back of orientation. Her heart feels as if it is a hummingbird ready to take flight out of her chest as the Dean said his closing remarks to the incoming class of freshmen. It was a sea of people she sat in, but to her, it was a sea of unknown. A final goodbye to her family and there it was, she was alone. But my dear, you are not alone, and you will never be. There will be trials in these next four years that will make you feel as if the world is against you. It will feel as if you heart has been broken in so many places that there is no way you can recover. But you can, you will. You will lift those broken pieces of yourself and manage to gracefully rediscover each piece. You will pour gold into those cracks and rebuild yourself into a stronger woman. Do not cover up the wounds that were made, but make them into something more magnificent as a symbol of the battle you’ve survived. You will run into people who’ve disguised themselves as sheep when they are truly wolves. You will believe they do have the best intentions, but will take the chance to break you as soon as turn around. Do not let these people jade you to loving and trusting. I know it will be hard with that big heart you have, but there are far better things in life for you. Do not give up on anything you want to do, but know when you need to walk away. Live fearlessly, but with caution. Remember that boats are safer in the harbor, but their purpose is not meant for that. There will come a day when you realize you are living a dream that was never yours. Do not waste the tears and the heartache that come from the thought of disappointing the people you love. They will always love you and if not, they do not deserve to be in your picture. Be wary on second chances because people do not always change for the better. The lessons won’t be easy, but you need them. The tough love you will receive will be the reason for your strength. It will hurt, and you will think that this pain will never end. I promise you, though, time heals all wounds. Accept yourself as a natural born leader and take the reins entirely. You will surprise yourself as to how much of an impact you will have on people’s lives. As the Japanese philosophy says on Kintsugi, rather than throwing an object out because it has a crack, the seam is filled with gold. Making a statement that it was just an occurrence that made the object more valuable rather than throwing it away. As are you my dear, a collection of broken pieces of a girl you once were. As your shattered spaces are filled with gold, you’ll recognize there is far more beauty in things that were broken and could be made whole again...
Love your 21-year-old self.
