I don't care what anybody says, "Bachelor" Monday's are what help me get through the week. It's the one shining light in my otherwise dull and boring life. I get to forget about my own problems, drink wine, and watch girls fight for a man they have no emotional attachment to.
The show is mystical and magical and downright terrible but I wouldn't have it any other way. And if you know, you know.
Here are a few thoughts everyone has while watching one guy date a bunch of girls each week.
1. I could totally be on this show.
I just have to get 20 pounds thinner and 10 times cuter and we're good to go.
2. I could never be on this show.
I like pasta and not confronting my feelings, so never mind.
5. If someone took me up in a helicopter, I would kiss him.
Just looking for a man who would take me on a helicopter ride. Please and thank you.
9. Honestly, if I was there I'd just drink and have a good time.
Free drinks all day, every day. I repeat, free drinks.
10. Wow, that kiss happened fast.
But so does everything in this godforsaken show, so who am I to judge?
11. How could he send HER home?
I get emotionally attached to these girls. You can't just send them home willy-nilly.
12. Where can I find a man that will take me on extravagant dates and wear suits and have a six pack?
*cough cough* Where you at home boy?
14. This is so stupid.
Why am I devoting 3 hours every week to watch girls fight over a dude they barely know just to get a dead flower and a ring they don't pay for?
20. They're going to paradise.
Can't wait. BIP is the best thing to come out of this whole franchise.
Is this a terrible show? Yes. Does it give people an unrealistic representation of love and relationships? Hell yes. Will I still watch it every day for as long as they give it to me? You bet your sweet pippy.
'The Bachelor' is a lifestyle, a commitment, a way of being apart of something bigger than myself. (Don't judge.)
Today I am 
Go to the gym
StableDiffusion
Listen to more music
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Have more patience
StableDiffusion
