This Week In Mom Fails

This Week In Mom Fails

Personal failures that should make you feel a little bit better.
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As moms, most of the time we focus on the things that we didn’t do right. Before we go to bed, we dwell on these things, tell ourselves we will do better only to do something just as bad or worse the next day. I see this over and over again in my mom groups that I’m involved in and even more in social media feeds. If it makes you feel any better, here are some of my mom fails from this week alone.

1. Too much screen time.

Guilty. In fact, I’m convinced that the tablet is the only reason why our oldest knows her ABCs, almost all the shapes, most numbers and every color. She can also do basic puzzles and connect the dots. It’s amazing.

2. Poptarts for breakfast.

I try to cook a warm breakfast two or three times a week, but let’s be honest, poptarts are always in demand. I could make a gourmet spread and I guarantee that poptarts would go first. I can’t compete with that.

3. Forgotten to change a pullup before bed.

You can imagine how this ended up. And I’ve done this several times. Even if I cut drinks off at 7pm, sheets still get soaked. I’ve also forgotten to put a pullup on our oldest, who is potty trained, just hasn’t mastered night time potty training.

4. Forgotten to brush teeth.

I will not admit to how many times this happens. They always remind me once they’re half asleep in bed too. It wouldn’t be that bad, but again, they remind me. We always make up for it in the morning.

5. Gone two days without a bath.

Good grief. Did you know it took me an hour and half the other night to bathe, brush teeth, cut nails, put lotion on, comb through the hair and put pajamas on both of the girls? I don’t understand how people with more than two kids can handle it. I'm still trying to figure out how more kids don't look like homeless kids from a Sarah McLachlan commerical.

6. Let the oldest wear the same outfit two days in a row.



Sometimes it’s just not worth the fight. For real. I have tried reasoning with this kid on more than one occasion, and it’s not worth it.

7. Dropped a four letter word while yelling at the oldest.

See the above. There are some things that aren’t worth it. I argue with this kid more than any person I’ve argued with before. She has to have a reason for everything, logic has to back it up and order has to follow. She’s a very type “A” person.

8. Ignored the youngest when she baby talks.

I do consider this a fail only because when the youngest gets upset or cranky, she does revert back to baby talk. She got hurt late last week and I ignored her until she could talk clear. Afterwards I felt terrible because a bruise started forming on her face from where she fell.

9. Let the youngest eat nothing but clementines for dinner.

Yep. This is a major fail. I always make the girls eat at least three bites of everything before letting them push their plates away. But this week, I was weaker than my youngest. She took one bite of everything and I gave in. Besides, having too many clemenintes will lead to nasty poops and maybe she’ll stop.

10. Thrown the McDonald's toy away by accident.

Yes. And they cried. They were the little cute barbies. I didn’t realize they were in the box before I tossed them in the trash. I wasn’t going to admit that mistake by digging through last night’s uneaten dinner to drag the barbies out, so we ended up going through the drive through again the next day.

11. Forgotten to take care of myself.

This is the biggest mom fail of all. I worry obsessively over our girls. Every fever, ear ache and cry and I’m right there making sure everything is okay. I lose sleep over their futures, hoping they can be leaders of a brighter tomorrow. I always put myself last. But in reality, I need to put myself first so I can be the best mom possible. Instead, I’m sick, in bed, writing my article hours past the deadline.

While moms look like superheroes to most and especially our children, we are human. We make mistakes and fumble like the rest of society. Raising children is one of the hardest jobs on the planet. It’s a miracle that any child makes it past the age three, or that could just be my skewed version of the world right now. Don’t beat yourself up over the little things. If you’re like me, you have least 14 more years to make a major mistake.

Cover Image Credit: Tiffany R

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College As Told By Junie B. Jones

A tribute to the beloved author Barbara Parks.
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The Junie B. Jones series was a big part of my childhood. They were the first chapter books I ever read. On car trips, my mother would entertain my sister and me by purchasing a new Junie B. Jones book and reading it to us. My favorite part about the books then, and still, are how funny they are. Junie B. takes things very literally, and her (mis)adventures are hilarious. A lot of children's authors tend to write for children and parents in their books to keep the attention of both parties. Barbara Park, the author of the Junie B. Jones series, did just that. This is why many things Junie B. said in Kindergarten could be applied to her experiences in college, as shown here.

When Junie B. introduces herself hundreds of times during orientation week:

“My name is Junie B. Jones. The B stands for Beatrice. Except I don't like Beatrice. I just like B and that's all." (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 1)

When she goes to her first college career fair:

"Yeah, only guess what? I never even heard of that dumb word careers before. And so I won't know what the heck we're talking about." (Junie B. Jones and her Big Fat Mouth, p. 2)

When she thinks people in class are gossiping about her:

“They whispered to each other for a real long time. Also, they kept looking at me. And they wouldn't even stop." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 66)

When someone asks her about the library:

“It's where the books are. And guess what? Books are my very favorite things in the whole world!" (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 27)

When she doesn't know what she's eating at the caf:

“I peeked inside the bread. I stared and stared for a real long time. 'Cause I didn't actually recognize the meat, that's why. Finally, I ate it anyway. It was tasty...whatever it was." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 66)

When she gets bored during class:

“I drew a sausage patty on my arm. Only that wasn't even an assignment." (Junie B. Jones Loves Handsome Warren, p. 18)

When she considers dropping out:

“Maybe someday I will just be the Boss of Cookies instead!" (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 76)

When her friends invite her to the lake for Labor Day:

“GOOD NEWS! I CAN COME TO THE LAKE WITH YOU, I BELIEVE!" (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 17)

When her professor never enters grades on time:

“I rolled my eyes way up to the sky." (Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch, p. 38)

When her friends won't stop poking her on Facebook:


“Do not poke me one more time, and I mean it." (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 7)

When she finds out she got a bad test grade:

“Then my eyes got a little bit wet. I wasn't crying, though." (Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus, p. 17)

When she isn't allowed to have a pet on campus but really wants one:

“FISH STICK! I NAMED HIM FISH STICK BECAUSE HE'S A FISH STICK, OF COURSE!" (Junie B. Jones Smells Something Fishy, p. 59)

When she has to walk across campus in the dark:

“There's no such thing as monsters. There's no such thing as monsters." (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed, p. 12)

When her boyfriend breaks her heart:

“I am a bachelorette. A bachelorette is when your boyfriend named Ricardo dumps you at recess. Only I wasn't actually expecting that terrible trouble." (Junie B. Jones Is (almost) a Flower Girl, p. 1)

When she paints her first canvas:


"And painting is the funnest thing I love!" (Junie B. Jones and her Big Fat Mouth, p. 61)

When her sorority takes stacked pictures:

“The biggie kids stand in the back. And the shortie kids stand in the front. I am a shortie kid. Only that is nothing to be ashamed of." (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed, p. 7)

When she's had enough of the caf's food:

“Want to bake a lemon pie? A lemon pie would be fun, don't you think?" (Junie B. Jones Has a Monster Under Her Bed p. 34)

When she forgets about an exam:

“Speechless is when your mouth can't speech." (Junie B. Jones Loves Handsome Warren, p. 54)

When she finds out she has enough credits to graduate:

“A DIPLOMA! A DIPLOMA! I WILL LOVE A DIPLOMA!" (Junie B. Jones is a Graduation Girl p. 6)

When she gets home from college:

"IT'S ME! IT'S JUNIE B. JONES! I'M HOME FROM MY SCHOOL!" (Junie B. Jones and some Sneaky Peaky Spying p. 20)

Cover Image Credit: OrderOfBooks

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A Poem: My Mother

In honor of Mother's Day, that was on the 12th, here is a poem dedicated to my mother.

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To the only person who can be my mentor, friend, and leader at the same time

To someone who would make me read my own books before bedtime

And puts everything down to make sure there is a smile on my face

To the person that I find impossible to ever replace.


Somehow you are always right even when it seems wrong

And when the worst does happen, how do you still manage to stay so strong?

I'm not only impressed but inspired by you

Knowing that somehow you'll always know me better than I do.


When I'm frustrated and annoy you, you simply try to understand me

Because you have always told me that even when you can't understand, plain acceptance is the key

You have listened to all my laughs, heard me cry, and felt my emotions like they were your own

You are the only reason I am joyous and the security I need to know that I am never alone.


To the only person who has truly taught me how to live

And watched me grow and make mistakes yet still knows how to forgive

Because that's who she is, certainly not like any other

There are many women but none like my own mother.

Happy Mother's Day!

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