If you're anything like me, human connection keeps you thriving. I crave the energy of others around me, and I tend to see the good in people, whether or not it has been earned. I feed off of giving and receiving love from the people closest to me, but I have learned that this love can have detrimental effects if it's being given to those not willing to fully receive it.

You encounter toxic people in all walks of life, no matter what situation you're in. These people appear in many manifestations: the narcissists, the bullies, the liars, the control freaks, etc. These people are typically easy to identify, and it's not difficult to see the problems that they cause in your every day life. What's more difficult to identify, is the toxic person who appears in the form of a friend or someone you care about.

The toxic people who appear as friends are more difficult to identify because you don't see the signs and symptoms as they present themselves. You make excuses for their behavior in your head, calming the voices that tell you that something isn't right. You turn your head to the feelings of confusion and sadness that occurs after spending time with them, blaming yourself for the problems you're creating in your own head. You lock away the parts of you that feel unsatisfied and unappreciated when you realize the relationship isn't equal, because they're your friend, and of course they care about you as much as you care about them. At least that's what you tell yourself.

Toxic friends drain you of your energy, consuming your thoughts while you are constantly scanning their moods in order to step around their feelings and ensure that you don't do anything to upset or disappoint them. You are constantly feeling the results of emotional whiplash that occurs when their mood switches in the blink of an eye, and that often results in you blaming yourself for setting them off. You feel a constant strain to combat their negativity with positivity, which ultimately fails because their unhappiness impacts you more than you would like to admit. Toxic friends often lack empathy, an ability to understand, and typically find your problems less important than their own. They're judgmental, harsh, and inconsistent, often leaving you frustrated by trying to understand them.

If you have a friend like that in your life, here's the catch: removing toxic people out of your life isn't actually the difficult part; not feeling guilty about it is.

I am going to tell you this now in case nobody else ever has: you are allowed to love yourself. You are allowed to take care of yourself. You are allowed to remove people who continuously hurt you from your life. You are allowed to rid yourself of the negativity that weighs on your chest with every breath you take. It is okay to be scared to leave; it is not okay to be scared to leave because you're afraid you won't find a friend that's better.

I like to think that souls are like locks, and that every person you encounter potentially has the key to unlock everything beautiful inside you. Love yourself enough to find people that make you better, that want to spend time with you, who don't drain you and make you feel like you're constantly trying to solve a puzzle where some of the pieces are missing. Find the people who believe in you, who push you to be the best version of yourself, who instill a confidence in you that you didn't even know you had. Do it because you owe it to yourself to be happy.

Find your key and unlock your happiness.