People are like icebergs.
People are indeed like icebergs not just because a part of them is hidden but more so of just how much of them is hidden.
When you look at icebergs (or in my case at least pictures of them) you only see 10% because the ice has 90% of the water’s density. Beneath the surface, there's a buttload of ice chilling and undiscovered.
Think about how that applies to us, humans.
Let’s be upfront with the fact that not everyone shows their full 100% self to others. I know for a fact I don’t. I don’t show my full 100 because that means not only am I showing who I am during the times I feel the most pretty and strong but when I am feeling ugly and vulnerable.
I didn’t typically share those moments because that is not how I wanted to portray myself. I didn’t want people to see someone who is painfully shy and insecure. Even in college, I didn't want people to see a girl who sometimes wished she could just hop in the car and drive home when life got tough.
I didn't want people to see the girl I felt like I was.
At least before I started writing, I didn’t. Before I started writing and revealing different pieces of who I am, I wanted to be perfect. I still do. I want to be well-liked, to make little mistakes, and to feel flawless. The more I write the more I start to reveal myself and the less scared I am to do it in person.
I know I am not alone when it comes to displaying the very best side of myself. Come on, don’t we all? I mean look at social media posts like on Instagram.
The typical photo supposed to show off our best side whether that be a nice thing we did for someone or how hot we look on the beach. Either way like to show people that our lives are #GOALS worthy. We filter, we tweak, and we retake pictures to give off an air of perfection.
Personally, I know people from back home who felt like their freshman year was hard and it was a rough time for them. Until I asked, I would have never been able to tell.
Now, you don't have to post how miserable you are if life sucks at the moment. If anything maybe staying off social media could help unless you need to reach out to someone then do it to get help.
I can't help but think that seeing people live the "perfect" life does more damage than good to someone struggling. When I'm having a bad day I stay far away from social media because it only makes me feel like I'm doing things wrong thus worsening my day.
Part of what I am trying to get across is don't assume that just because someone's Instagram is aesthetic or their pics are bomb AF that they don't have struggles. That's not really fair to them because you're assuming they don't have their own problems. And for the sake of being real, we all have our own things we carry with us. That's okay, it makes you human.
If you don't have a single care in the world then keep on keepin' on, girl.
The other point I want to get across is to make sure you're taking time to get to know those people around you. Whether it be a classmate, a sorority sister, or someone you volunteer with. Put in some work. I challenge you to engage in more self-disclosure and less selfie exposure.
Self-disclosure is when we open up to each other about ourselves, share information and slowly get to know each other for who we really are. Thus building relationships on a foundation of trust. We get relationships that can last because it's more than just a shallow "Hey, how are ya" in passing or likes and "yas queens" on photos.
When we engage in self-disclosure we begin to push the rest of our iceberg out of the water.