The Cookie Culprit

The Cookie Culprit

Throughout this article they will remain nameless because I have no idea who they are.
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It was the night of November 12th, 2017. When I went to bed, a care package consisting of delicious homemade chocolate chip cookies made my mom sat on a shelf, mostly full. When I woke up on the morning of November 13th, most of the cookies WERE GONE. Let’s backtrack a little, and see if we can figure out how this happened…

It was a Sunday night, and I was coming back to school after spending the weekend at home. At some point during the weekend, I was in the basement doing my laundry (like all college kids do when they go home), and my mom pulled a box of cookies out of the freezer.

“I made you a care package,” she said, “I was going to send it, but I’m trying to save on postage, so you can just take it with you.”

Before we go any further, let me explain something. Getting snail mail in college is like getting mail when you’re six: it’s super exciting. Even if it’s just a note from one of your friends, it’s nice to find something in your mailbox. Since last year was my first year at college, my mom would send me a card every month or so. I’m part way into my second semester of my sophomore year, and my mailbox hasn’t seen much action.

Anyway, I was a little disappointed that I wouldn’t be getting mail, but it was still a box of two dozen substantially sized chocolate chunk cookies, so I wasn’t going to complain.

When I got back to my dorm, I started handing out these cookies to my friends, because I knew I would not be eating them all myself, and I just really like to share. So I passed out a few, and then went to visit my hard-working friends in the architecture studio. I probably handed out at least a dozen there before going back to my room for the night. I’m not sure how many were left when I went to bed; there may have been eight or ten, but the important thing was I could not see the bottom.

When I got up in the morning, I opened up the box because, well, let’s be honest, I was going to have a cookie for breakfast. I opened up the box, and most of the cookies WERE GONE. So now we’re back to where we started. There was maybe three or four cookies left, and I was perplexed. I texted my friends in the group chat and asked if anyone had come into my room to grab one sometime during the night, but it was a no from everyone. I was very confused, and remain confused to this day because I still don’t know who did it. I didn’t even care that they were gone, because like I said, I wasn’t going to eat them all anyway, so I just wanted to know where they went. It will always be a mystery to me, and I may never know the answer.

If you are reading this Cookie Culprit, please come forward so I can finally put my mind at ease.

Cover Image Credit: Google

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8 Reasons Girls Who Love Tequila Are Better

Because if she can handle tequila, she can handle you too.
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There are all kinds of alcohol stereotypes out there but the one associated with tequila is probably the worst: tequila makes you crazy. But if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that women who drink tequila are one-of-a-kind.

Whether it's loving or fighting, you'll never find anyone who does it better than a girl who just straight up loves tequila, and here are a few reasons why that is.

1. She's independent

A girl who drinks tequila is probably the same girl who has absolutely no problem telling it like it is. She knows what she wants and goes after it.

2. She doesn't care what you or anyone else thinks

Oh, you have a problem with me taking shots and having a good time? Well, get over it! Bartender, a shot with salt and a lime please!

3. Always dancing

Tequila is an 'upper' so instead of sitting at the bar doing nothing, let's dance! Let's get moving!

4. There is never a dull moment

Speaking of dancing, a girl who drinks tequila is always down for a good time. Whether it's going on an adventure or seeing who can take the most shots, a tequila girl is always down to party.

5. While everyone else is starting to get sleepy, she has all the energy

Like I said, tequila is an 'upper' so while the other girls at the bar are starting to feel groggy and sad, she's all over the place having fun and partying on the dancefloor.

6. She's stronger than the girl crying over a vodka cranberry at the bar.

Sad over a breakup? Don't go for the vodka... Tequila will make you feel better in no time! Plus you can challenge the hot guys at the bar to a shot taking contest.

7. Tequila is healthy for you

Tequila is a probiotic, so some tequila a day keeps the doctor away. Yay for shots!

8. She can hold her own when it comes to alcohol

Any girl who can shoot some shots at the bar all day and night can handle alcohol, which means she can handle herself too. You won't have to deal with her constant breakdowns and mood swings because she will be too busy ordering more shots.

Cover Image Credit: Whiskey Riff

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10 Reasons To Start Vaping In 2019 If You Haven't Yet

"It's safer than cigarettes"

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Vaping is the rage these days among adolescents and college students. Here are some great reasons to start!

1. It's what all the cool kids do

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I wish that I could be like the cool kids

2. It damages your lungs

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It's not like you need these to breathe or anything

3. It pollutes the air

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Let's pollute the air even more!

4. Nicotine addiction

Just the thing I want to be addicted to

5. "Delicious" flavors

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Would you prefer mango flavor or the cancer flavor?

6. The Juul looks like a USB

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Your parents won't suspect a thing

7. Inhale metals like nickel and lead

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Yummmmmm. Lead poisoning isn't a thing.

8. More likely to get infections

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9. You'll eventually want cigarettes

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And you'll make your lungs worse

10. Lung and mouth cancer

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Who doesn't want cancer

In case you couldn't tell, this was very sarcastic. If you want all of these things, then go ahead, start vaping. But you should know what you're getting yourself into and be prepared for the consequences.

If you already vape, I mean no disrespect and I'm not trying to hate on you, but you should seriously stop. Whatever you think is a good reason for vaping really is not a good enough reason to damage your body.

Stop vaping. And if you don't vape, don't start. Just don't.

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