The Art Of 'Doing Enough'

The Art Of 'Doing Enough'

I could handle anything and everything that was thrown at me, and even when I did it all and did it right, I still felt like I could do more.

124
views

Do you fall into the trap of needing to completely occupy your time, or feeling like you're not successful unless your day is jam-packed with running all over the place?

You wake up at the crack of dawn to work out, quickly run home to shower and get ready before class, rush to work, and then afterward still have to do homework or go food shopping. But you get this overwhelming sense of feeling like you are so successful because you just stretched yourself so thin, yet somehow got it all done.

That has summed up my life for the last four years. Having my day completely booked is almost a distraction for me. I'm running away from my thoughts, my problems, my feelings. So, when I'm busy, I can't think about those things.

I have a deep-rooted sense of never being enough, whether that be for myself or for everyone else. I'm terrified of letting others down. "Disappointed" is a word I never want to hear from others, but somehow, I always end up disappointing myself by pleasing them. I'm left overstretched, stressed out, and holding onto my sanity by a thread.

But that's okay because everyone is happy. I made it to class on time, to work on time, to my appointments, to get dinner with my friends. I did it all. I feel a sense of fulfillment of knowing that I'm doing everything I possibly can.

The days I rest are a different story. The days that I decided to not work out, I don't have class or work, the days when I can just completely veg out, are the days I feel like a failure. I feel lazy. I feel like I'm wasting a perfect day to get stuff done.

I'm only going to say this once, but some days not doing anything, is doing more than enough. Mental health is so crucial for your physical health as well. I've made myself sick over how stressed out I was. By putting so much on my plate, barely sleeping, drinking too much caffeine, eating snacks, and not having enough water and meals, I got sick because of the stress I thought I could handle.

The truth is, I was trying to prove to everyone and myself that I can do X, Y, and Z and do it damn well. I could handle anything and everything that was thrown at me, and even when I did it all and did it right, I still felt like I could do more. Or that what I was doing wasn't enough. There was always one more mile I could've run or one more thing I could've done; nothing was ever good enough.

When, in reality, the thing I wasn't doing enough of was self-care and self-compassion. I was doing enough, way more than enough, and I didn't realize that until I had finally broke. My body gave up on me. It physically stopped me from doing what I wanted. It told me no, for the first time in a very long time.

Sitting with that feeling was extremely hard. Knowing that you can't do the things you want and having to face not doing a million things is so uncomfortable. That's when the quote, "Life starts at the end of your comfort zone," really comes into play.

Being tied to doing too much is never a good thing. You are putting yourself last. You are losing pieces of yourself every single day in order to make others feel whole.

Taking care of yourself is enough. Laying in sweats all day and eating ice cream is enough. Simply just breathing and putting one foot in front of the other on really bad days, is enough.

I can promise you that, sometimes, the littlest things can make you feel the most successful and fulfilled. You just have to find what those things are for you.

Popular Right Now

The Truth About Young Marriage

Different doesn't mean wrong.
107334
views

When I was a kid, I had an exact picture in my mind of what my life was going to look like. I was definitely not the kind of girl who would get married young, before the age of 25, at least.

And let me tell you, I was just as judgmental as that sentence sounds.

I could not wrap my head around people making life-long commitments before they even had an established life. It’s not my fault that I thought this way, because the majority opinion about young marriage in today’s society is not a supportive one. Over the years, it has become the norm to put off marriage until you have an education and an established career. Basically, this means you put off marriage until you learn how to be an adult, instead of using marriage as a foundation to launch into adulthood.

When young couples get married, people will assume that you are having a baby, and they will say that you’re throwing your life away — it’s inevitable.

It’s safe to say that my perspective changed once I signed my marriage certificate at the age of 18. Although marriage is not always easy and getting married at such a young age definitely sets you up for some extra challenges, there is something to be said about entering into marriage and adulthood at the same time.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

Getting married young does not mean giving up your dreams. It means having someone dream your dreams with you. When you get lost along the way, and your dreams and goals seem out of reach, it’s having someone there to point you in the right direction and show you the way back. Despite what people are going to tell you, it definitely doesn’t mean that you are going to miss out on all the experiences life has to offer. It simply means that you get to share all of these great adventures with the person you love most in the world.

And trust me, there is nothing better than that. It doesn’t mean that you are already grown up, it means that you have someone to grow with.

You have someone to stick with you through anything from college classes and changing bodies to negative bank account balances.

You have someone to sit on your used furniture with and talk about what you want to do and who you want to be someday.

Then, when someday comes, you get to look back on all of that and realize what a blessing it is to watch someone grow. Even after just one year of marriage, I look back and I am incredibly proud of my husband. I’m proud of the person he has become, and I’m proud of what we have accomplished together. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our lives have in store for us.

“You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your one true love?" — One Tree Hill
Cover Image Credit: Sara Donnelli Photography

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Why You Should Bring Your Close Friend As Your Formal Date

Before asking that cute girl to formal think about asking a friend

74
views

Every year since I was a junior in high school I have always looked forward to homecoming or prom. When I got to college I began to look forward to my fraternity formal. I was never concerned with what to wear or the expense of formal but rather who I was going to ask. It can be difficult to make a decision. If you ask anyone friends with me they will tell you how I am one of the most indecisive people out there. There are so many people I am friendly with or have a close relationship that it can feel difficult to make a decision. But let's look at that phrase again. You might think why does he want to bring someone who is his friend to his fraternity formal rather than someone he likes or is dating. To answer this question, some of the girls I have liked I have not been able to be the true me around and that also applies to the girls I have dated as well. I am different around my friends and I want someone to know the real me rather than me just having to pretend.

Maybe I am still experiencing the effects of a fun weekend but I have noticed that every formal or prom that I have brought a date with not only was a fun formal but interacted and connected well with my friends. That is the main thing I look for in a formal date, they need to be liked by my friends and many of them are still pretty friendly after the formal. You are spending the weekend with them and the drive down for you formal. There will be a lot of time spent with your date so it is important to bring someone you know you will have fun with. I am not saying that there isn't anything wrong with bringing someone else but I always found it best to bring a friend if you are not dating someone.

Think about the people you know you will always have fun with. This can be an indication of who you should bring and why but you should also think about the positives in this situation. Your fun and the time spent with the people should be prioritized before anything else. This event is about you and you should have someone with you that you know is fun to be around and someone you can enjoy yourself around along with your friends. Friends know you as well as you know yourself so there is not an idea of having to pretend to be someone else. The good thing about friends is that you do not run out of things to talk about and there is always something new to learn. Take your formal as a trip that you get to experience with the people closest to you. That is my take.

The key for me is to know that I will have fun with my date at formal. The drive to formal can be long and you are sharing a hotel room with your date along with spending time with them during the trip. I talk a lot. I want someone I know who I can carry a conversation with and will not just respond with words such as Yeah or Sounds good. I have always been able to remember not only my formals but specific parts of it as well. I think this is possible because of who I have brought and the memories I made with them.

Formals are important to everyone so think about who you want to spend that moment with. There is nothing wrong with bringing someone who you like but there also is nothing wrong with bringing a friend. Some people might bring someone they are dating but you should not have to compare yourself to other people. Do what makes you happy but remember this weekend is about you and you deserve to bring someone you will have fun with.

Related Content

Facebook Comments