I think we can all own up to the fact that when we break up with someone, we don't speak the best about them.
We remember the end when everything was tense, and we do our best not to remember the good parts because it makes everything hurt worse. Yet sometimes things don't work out, not because they were terrible people, but simply because they didn't love us right. I am very happy that my boyfriend's exes didn't love him right. It means that I am now able to.
As I am sitting here thinking about how I am the luckiest girl in the world to have my man, it makes me think about his past relationships. I struggle with the idea that I am actually different, an attribute I can thank my not-so-good exes for giving me. I know a lot of the negatives about those relationships, and there is always one thing in common.
He didn't love them. Not really anyway.
I am a firm believer that you cannot truly love someone who does not love you correctly in return. Things may seem happy and they may seem easy, but there is a good chance that you are with that person simply because it is indeed easy. This is why so many people look back on those they dated in high school and wonder what in the world was wrong with them. It was convenient and the choices were limited.
Therefore, you were "happy."
Life changes as you get older and people change. You realize that people didn't love you for you. They didn't love you for a future together. They loved you because you were the star athlete, the one with money, a popular one that everyone liked, or maybe the needy one who could be there just when they needed you. When I think about who he has dated in the past, I see those things. Yes, good intentions were there, but it was not right.
I cannot explain how happy I am that none of it was right.
I love him when he's moody, has had a rough day, has no money, sports aren't working out for him, he isn't happy with his schooling, and many, many other times. I love him when he's happy, energetic, rambling on about something I know nothing about, and all of the other times he is unexplainably happy.
The girls of his past didn't do that. They didn't love him like he needed to be loved.
If you are one of those girls, thank you. Thank you for helping to shape him into the man that he is today, but thank you for not being right for him. That sounds selfish, but I want to be selfish when it comes to him. You took advantage of the time you had with him, and I will never do that.
I am thankful for every single second that I have with him, and nothing will change that. Thank you for the lessons you have taught him, but please know that he is in the best hands possible now. I will love him like he deserves, and I will make him happy for the rest of his life.
I wish you true happiness, but thank you for letting me have mine.