The Tale Of A Mixed-Race Child And Her Never Ending Identity Crisis
Start writing a post
popular

The Tale Of A Mixed-Race Child And Her Never Ending Identity Crisis

In a world where your identity is often decided for you, race is always a contributor.

5305
The Tale Of A Mixed-Race Child And Her Never Ending Identity Crisis
Personal Photo

Some people claim “they see no race” when it comes to defining people, but if the past few years haven’t proved that statement to be the falsest thing ever said, then I don’t know what will. Let’s be real for a second – race does matter. Unfortunately, it has mattered for the worse more frequently than the better, but we can’t pretend like it holds no meaning. It affects how we are seen in the world, and it most definitely defines us, whether we’re White, Black, Asian, European – you get the picture. Race is an identity that you are given, whether you like it or not, when you are born. That being said, what if you don’t fit into any one racial category? Does that mean you still have an identity to fit into? Based on my own experiences, I can tell you right now that it often feels like you don’t.

I am a mixed child; product of a very white mother and a very Sri Lankan father (Sri Lanka is that teeny tiny island off the coast of Southern India, btw). When I was really little, I used to think everyone had parents that looked completely different from each other, and I didn’t even know what race was to be honest (ah, the naivety of a child). Then I started to make friends, the majority of which had two white parents, or two Asian parents, and very rarely would I come across parents of different races.

This probably contributed to my shyness growing up, though not the only reason, because although I didn’t necessarily look too different from my classmates my name definitely stood out every single day when the teacher was calling attendance. In plain words, I thought I was weird, abnormal, strange, you name it, because I didn’t even understand what race I belonged to. It was frustrating to have my classmates assume my race, and people would often say you look Italian or Russian or Hispanic, but I was none of those things. How can I be Sri Lankan and white if I don’t look entirely like either one?

One of the most traumatizing, race related moments of my childhood was when we were reading a book about culture in pairs. A Muslim woman was shown wearing a Hijab, and the boy who was my partner pointed at me and laughed, “Hey, look, it’s you!” Though this is extremely offensive and by all means shows just what a charming young man he was, he meant it as an insult; to hurt my feelings. And that it did. Not because of the race he was assuming me to be, but because of that mocking tone in his voice that clearly meant I was different. It took me until my last year of high school to fully understand that being different and racially unique was a good thing, but that’s a story for another day.

My point is, in my mere nineteen years on this planet, I haven’t felt like I truly belong to any one race. When I go to Sri Lanka, my relatives all say how white I am, and when I visit my family in Connecticut, it’s obvious that my tan skin and black hair doesn’t quite fit in with my pale, freckled, blue eyed cousins. The only thing I truly feel like I can identify with is not a race but a group of people: my siblings. They are the only ones who see themselves as I do. We are outsiders to our own racial identity, and there definitely is not a big population of half white half Sri Lankans out there. Maybe this feeling of no belonging will change, but until then I can enjoy the comfort of my siblings’ experiences and our uniqueness to guide me through my ongoing racial uncertainty.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Types of ice cream

Who doesn't love ice cream? People from all over the world enjoy the frozen dessert, but different countries have their own twists on the classic treat.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

100 Reasons to Choose Happiness

Happy Moments to Brighten Your Day!

33543
A man with a white beard and mustache wearing a hat

As any other person on this planet, it sometimes can be hard to find the good in things. However, as I have always tried my hardest to find happiness in any and every moment and just generally always try to find the best in every situation, I have realized that your own happiness is much more important than people often think. Finding the good in any situation can help you to find happiness in some of the simplest and unexpected places.

Keep Reading...Show less
Christmas

Remember The True Meaning of Christmas

“Where are you Christmas? Why can’t I find you?”

3917
A painting of the virgin Mary, the baby Jesus, and the wise men

It’s everyone’s favorite time of year. Christmastime is a celebration, but have we forgotten what we are supposed to be celebrating? There is a reason the holiday is called Christmas. Not presentmas. Not Santamas. Not Swiftmas. Christmas.

boy standing in front of man wearing santa claus costume Photo by __ drz __ on Unsplash



What many people forget is that there is no Christmas without Christ. Not only is this a time to spend with your family and loved ones, it is a time to reflect on the blessings we have gotten from Jesus. After all, it is His birthday.


Keep Reading...Show less
Golden retriever sat on the sand with ocean in the background
Photo by Justin Aikin on Unsplash

Anyone who knows me knows how much I adore my dog. I am constantly talking about my love for her. I attribute many of my dog's amazing qualities to her breed. She is a purebred Golden Retriever, and because of this I am a self-proclaimed expert on why these are the best pets a family could have. Here are 11 reasons why Goldens are the undisputed best dog breed in the world.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

Boyfriend's Christmas Wishlist: 23 Best Gift Ideas for Her

Here are the gifts I would like to ask my boyfriend for to make this season unforgettable.

89884
Young woman opening a Christmas gift

Recently, an article on Total Sorority Move called 23 Things My Boyfriend Better Not Get Me For Christmas, was going around on social media. I hope the author of this was kidding or using digital sarcasm, but I am still repulsed and shocked by the lack of appreciation throughout this article. I would like to represent the girlfriends out there who disagree with her standpoint -- the girlfriends who would be more than happy to receive any of these gifts from their boyfriends.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments