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How To Take Care Of A Turkey

They're your friends, not your food

Jordan Peyton

Nov 20, 2017

Kansas State University

255

Unsplash

It’s turkey season. No, I’m not talking about how to prepare a turkey for your Thanksgiving meal, I’m talking about raising a turkey.

Step 1: Acquiring the Turkey

Where do you buy a live turkey? Well from what I’ve researched (after a quick Google search) they’re seasonal and can be shipped but only as chicks. So, make sure you find a good Turkey dealer way ahead of the Thanksgiving season! Of course, only to invite it to Thanksgiving with you and certainly not to eat.

Step 2: Feeding the Turkey

I’m not a turkey expert and every turkey is different, but I heard they like fruit loops. I’m kidding, please don’t give your turkey fruit loops. Just go to your nearest feed store and ask what food would be best suited for your turkey.

Step 3: Bonding with the Turkey

Give the turkey a bed to sleep on, like a dog bed, but a turkey bed. Put the bed by the couch, turn on the TV, watch some rom-coms, veg out on snacks together, eat ice cream, go through some hardships, and consider yourself bonded with your turkey.

Step 4: Growing Old with the Turkey

The domesticated turkey only lives an average of 10 years so make sure you cherish every moment with your turkey because you will…hopefully outlive your turkey. Bring them to every Thanksgiving and make them a plate, say a prayer, and chow down on some good eats. *NOT YOUR TURKEY, TURKEYS ARE FRIENDS NOT FOOD*

Happy Thanksgiving and remember, your turkey is your friend, not your meal.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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How To Take Care Of A Turkey

They're your friends, not your food

Step 1: Acquiring the Turkey

Step 2: Feeding the Turkey

Step 3: Bonding with the Turkey

Step 4: Growing Old with the Turkey

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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