When Everything Seems To Be Going Wrong, Remember The Little Things To Focus On The Good
Listening to good music, watching something that makes you laugh, laughing with friends, calling your mom, writing down the things that are most important to you are all things that can help you remember all the good in your life even when you feel overwhelmed.
Lately, I feel like I've been living in a pinball machine. Just when I think I have everything under control and everything seems to be on the up and up, something comes out of nowhere and makes me feel unbalanced all over again. I feel like the world around me is moving so much faster than I can and it's like a continues game of catch up. It's in moments like these in my life that why are difficult, they help me to reevaluate what's important. So, I thought I'd share my ways of coping with the times in life where I can't seem to keep up and stay on top.
The first thing I do when I get overwhelmed is to list off 5 things I am thankful for at that moment. Not just general things, but really specific things that make me think hard and recall all the great in my life even in the midst of difficult times. It instantly transforms my feelings into being more positive and upbeat because I'm actively thinking about all I have to be grateful for and that makes me happy. For example, the other day in order to re-center my thoughts I listed 1. The hug I got from my grandma on Easter, 2. Driving around the lake with the windows down over the weekend, 3. How good my morning run was and that it was my fastest run in a long time, 4. How close I am with my mom, 5. How sunny it was these past few days. Being able to put more emphasis on the good and the things I have to be grateful for overpowering those feelings of anxiety and defeat.
Another thing I like to do is to be in the presence of those who put me in a good mood. When I need a pick me up, I know I can count on my friends, at home and school, and my family to pick me up. I allow myself to take a break from whatever I'm doing or give myself some time at the end of the day to hang with friends in our house or facetime the ones that don't live close. There is nothing that a call to my mom can't fix, she always helps to put me in a better mood and think about the good in every situation. Also being in the presence of my friends allows me to laugh and have fun and forget about all the responsibilities I have for even a little bit, to remind me that even with whatever life throws my way these people will always have my back.
It doesn't matter whether its big or small things, but if they can help you re-focus and remember all the good that's what truly matters. Listening to good music, watching something that makes you laugh, laughing with friends, calling your mom, and writing down the things that are most important to you are all things that can help you remember all the good in your life even when you feel overwhelmed.
Stop Judging People If Their Resolution Is To Lose Weight
Last time I checked it's not 'your gym,' sweetie.
Studies show that the top 3 resolutions for the new year are to eat healthier, exercise more and lose weight.
These are amazing resolutions, but these are also resolutions that are harshly judged in the public eye.
As a curvy woman, I used to feel beyond insecure about going to the gym or ordering a salad from a restaurant. In my head, all I thought about was people saying "she's doing that wrong" or "I know she didn't get that way by eating salads" or some other negative comment that I saw being commented somewhere else. As result, I'd stop going to the gym and begin eating poorly.
I know what you might be thinking. These are things all in my head or I shouldn't let some random person make me feel less. Yet some people aren't as strong as others when it comes to these harsh comments. There is a high expectation for what our bodies should look like and when people tell us we don't fit in that category, we start to not like ourselves.
Luckily over the years, I have gained so much more confidence because of who I surround myself with. But I know that is not the case for everyone.
Granted there are people who positively encourage this change, but it's those negative comments that hurt a person more. There can be 100 comments saying how someone is looking great and looked at as an inspiration, but as I said, it only takes one comment/person to make someone feel highly discouraged from reaching their goal.
Losing weight is seen as the 'basic resolution' but it's not a basic action. It is life changing experience and no one should make that goal seem unreachable.
Already I have seen so many Snapchat /Instagram mentions about how annoying it is when a gym is full of 'those new years resolution people" at the beginning of the month. The biggest thing I ask when someone I know says this is "since when do you get to decide how another person should live their life" and sometimes I'm petty and will say "last time I checked it's not your gym sweetie", I'm sorry but it's not. Gyms build a person mentally and physically, don't take that away from someone because you think you can dictate on who comes in the gym.
It doesn't matter if it's a stranger or even your friend who has this solution, take it seriously and encourage them to follow through with their goal rather than discourage.
Rather than judging someone for wanting to make a positive change in their lives, we need to encourage them and let that person do them.
So before you comment on someone's looks, body, lifestyle, think to yourself "how is this going to make that person feel?" or "what kind of person does that make me if I decide to tear that person down?"
I wish all those people whose resolution is to eat healthier, exercise more and lose weight the best of luck because I'm about to go through that life-changing experience myself. No matter what your goal is, it can be reached one way or another.