To The Guy Friend That Pushed The Envelope Too Far, Respect My Boundaries
A reminder that there is a clear boundary between being friends and wanting something more.
Dear friend,
I don't know if you will see this, but here's what I want you to know:
I met you at a low point in life and am thankful for having you to talk to when no one else would listen. Even though we had two different personalities you gave me hope that things would get better. However, I got busy and times have changed. We've gone our own ways, but what bothered me the most were your actions that pushed for something more.
Even after numerous instances where friends turned flirty, I called out your actions, told you to stop, but eventually, you persisted. You don't seem to get how your actions affect me and cause lots of confusion. And no, I'm not crazy for thinking that you stroking my arm, putting your head on my shoulder, and reaching for my hand is just "what guy friends do." You lie and say you don't have feelings for me which is obviously not true, proving evidence of your current actions.
After I said "stop sending me shirtless Snapchat selfies," you persisted with your flirty Snapchats. Even after I felt like I had said no so many times, it is if my voice didn't matter. While increasingly getting fed up, I took matters into my own hands and shoved you out so you would eventually stop. I wish it could have been different, but you needed to learn your lesson on how to restrain yourself when things go too far. It makes women uncomfortable and there are plenty of other guys that are better at communicating your emotions than you do.
I want you to know that your friend/flirty actions trap other women into a state of confusion, so they will keep coming back for more. I know I'm not alone and that there are plenty of other women just like me, more than willing to tell the same story over and over again. I showed you that I can be in control of your actions against me, even when society at times refuses to believe women have strengths and aren't just objects/pretty things to look at.
So here I am, unhinged, out of a cage showing the world I have as much power as you do. Righting the ship, righting the wrongs, and showing my equality to the rest of the world. I do not need to put up with your repetitive actions or, as a man has said to me, "put up with some of it because you're a woman." I also don't need to "just be his friend" to fit the "nice" stereotype that is expected of all women. I can be respectful, disciplined, and fair. Notice that nice doesn't necessarily fall under those three categories.
After experiencing a large amount of oppression from my guy peers in the past year, your case would be on the more severe side. And I'm here to let you know, I can take you too.
Sincerely,
Your Ex-friend
