If you don't keep up with pop culture, haven't seen Life Time's explosive "Surviving R. Kelly" documentary, or just are wondering what in the world is going on here with all of this legal jargon, I am here to break it down and give you all the receipts.

The Documentary

Let's start from the beginning, when "Surviving R. Kelly" hit the television in January, there was reopened frustration that shook the nation. If you haven't seen the documentary, I highly suggest you give it a watch, but in short you're left with a few lingering questions. Why is nobody investigating this "sex cult?" Why is Sony Records still employing R. Kelly as an artist? Why has no one been talking about these missing girls? Not long after the documentary aired however, Sony dropped Kelly from their label. To much controversy. LOL. Let's think about the over three decades of controversy that was covered up because of greed and apathy.

The New Arrest

Remember Stormy Daniel's lawyer Michael Avenatti? He claimed to have video evidence against Kelly different from the original 2008 trial. Which honestly, I was definitely skeptical of this TV Attorney in this hail Mary attempt to redeem his most recent legal troubles. However to my surprise, on February 22, 2019, a little over a month after the release of the documentary, R. Kelly was arrested again for ten counts of aggravated sexual abuse on four victims, three victims between the ages of 13 and 17. Mega yuck. What the heck is aggravated sexual abuse? To save all of the fluffy wording, it is basically coercing someone to consent to sexual activity with a threat attached to it. Not the move. Bond was set at one million dollars, which means to post bail you have to get $100,000 together. Now, R. Kelly did not have that so he sat there for a hot minute *internal cheers.* However, a fan posted the money after meeting the singer on a cruise....Y'ALL. My wig is blown. Can you imagine gifting 100k to some guy you barely know??? We do not stan.

The Gayle King Interview

Gayle King just made her mark in broadcast journalism history. Looking at how she stayed focused dealing with a psychopath in a major narcissistic episode is something I will forever give a standing O. It reminded me of when Greta Van Susteren made her mark in broadcast journalism when she interviewed O.J. Simpson in 2004. There were so many iconic quotes throughout this interview, but my personal favorite is when she looks at Kelly and states, "You sound like you're playing the victim here." In my life, I've always been told a hit dog hollars', and I feel like King capitalized on that.

Arrest Pt. 2 Circa 2019

The man is back at it again!!! This time not for his mistreatment of women, but his negligence of his children. On March 6, 2019, Kelly was taken into custody for failing to pay his ex-wife, Andrea Kelly, $161,000 in child support. Love that song. Finally, you would think that we would finally be rid of our R. Kelly blues until the impending sexual abuse trial. NOPE! It's unknown how the money was paid, but on March 9, 2019, bond for the 161k was posted and Kelly was quoted as saying "We're going to straighten all of this stuff out," as he left jail. CAN YOU BELIEVE??? I was big mad about that. Honestly, it ruined my workout. What made my eyes roll back was as he left a fan reached out and said "I love you, touch my hand!" Honestly, it is natural selection at this point.

Lawyer Death Bed Confession

Now, if I'm being real, Ed Genson was wrong for this. Genson was Kelly's 2008 attorney in his historic child pornography case, and has recently been diagnosed with bile cancer. He also has recently been reported as stating that Kelly was, "guilty as hell" in the 2008 trial. This therefore violated the attorney-client privilege that lawyers swear to. Although this gave me a laugh, because it stated the obvious, technically was out of line and seems like a last ditch attempt for someone's 15 minutes. Let's rise above the filth, you know??

That is all there is to report for now on the infamous R. Kelly! 2019 has been a time where everyone seems to be winning except for Kelly. Even though he's out among the living now, more and more people are aware of the crimes against him and the shamed singer's true character. Which if you didn't know by now, it's pond scum. Actually, it's probably beneath pond scum at this point. Hopefully, the next update will be something like "15 Ways R. Kelly's Guilty Verdict Is A Win For the #MeToo Movement."