Sometimes You Win Some And Lose A Lot

Sometimes You Win Some And Lose A Lot

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For the first time in my nineteen years of existence, I finally figured out that life isn't fair. This past week has been the hardest week of my life.

It was one of those weeks where every possible thing that could go wrong, went wrong and I was left with nothing but my vulnerability and raw emotions. My heart was broken, my mind was stressed to the max, and it seemed like my life was spiraling.

Now you've read that and you're probably thinking that something insanely tragic happened. Well it didn't. But after three parking tickets, an emotionally draining weekend at work, gaining three pounds from stress eating, studying for two tests and a midterm, and getting zero to no sleep, I finally broke down.

To give an idea of what I mean by "emotionally draining weekend at work," you need to know that I work at an animal shelter. I see a lot of things that would make people sick. Every time that I think humanity couldn't possibly be anymore cruel, it surprises me.

These animals know better than anyone what it can be like to "win some and lose a lot." They know that sometimes the lows in life aren't just a bad day; sometimes they are a bad week, month, or even year.

I have been extremely blessed in my life to only experience bad days with the occasional stressful week. However, this week showed me that sometimes we have to deal with multiple punches and learn to roll with them. We have to be content with accepting the tiny triumphs and handling the numerous tragedies.

The good news is that we don't have to do it alone either. God is always holding our hand and rooting for us. He didn't set us up for failure even though it can feel like it at times. He's also given us people in our lives to support us. I called at least four people to complain or cry or a combination of both. I've realized I can be vulnerable with them and say "I'm not fine."

One last thing I've learned this week: it's ok to fail. Let me say it again... IT'S OK TO FAIL. I'm not even half way through this week and I've already gotten three parking tickets, failed two tests, and cried three times.

I'm a mess and I've accepted that. My hair isn't brushed and my eyes are puffy and I've accepted that. My grades took a hit this week and I've accepted that. I've cried more than a normal person should in the last three days and I've accepted that because there's always hope that tomorrow or next week or next month will be better. The Lord will not let the darkness reign in my life because he is the light of my life.


Cover Image Credit: https://www.pexels.com/photo/adult-back-view-beach-calmness-614503/

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I'm A Christian Girl And I'm Not A Feminist, Because God Did Not Intend For Women To Be Equals

It is OK for me to not want to be equivalent with a man.

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To start off, I am not writing this to bash feminists or get hate messages. I am simply writing this to state why I do not perceive myself as a feminist.

March is International Women's Month and that is what has got me thinking about how I view myself as a young woman in the 21st century. I enjoy every day getting to soak up the world as a young lady, particularly in the South.

If you know me, then you know that I love and utterly adore Jesus. He is so perfect. He is everything. He is my whole life. Some people might say that I am a "Bible-thumper" or someone who has had too much Kool-aid and maybe I am, but I know who my Creator is and that He died for me, and that is all that matters.

In my young age, I loved to just sit in church with my parents and absorb all that God would deliver. As I have grown up, I have ventured off and joined a church that is different than my parents, so the responsibility falls more on me, but I love that. Since this era of independence began, I have thoroughly enjoyed taking ownership of my faith.

I spend a lot of time chatting with God, worshipping Him in all kinds of ways, and just diving deeper into His Word. Through all of this growth as a Christian, I have learned a lot, but something I have learned is a concept that some may not agree with, which does not surprise me.

I do not believe God meant for women and men to be equal.

There, I acknowledged the elephant in the room.

It is a shocker, I know, but I have some Biblical evidence to back up this belief that I have.

Let us begin in Genesis. God created man and then he created woman. This was two separate occurrences and order is key. He created Adam and then Eve.

Jesus treated women with grace and kindness, do not get me wrong. I mean just look at how He treated the woman at the well, the one who used all of her expensive perfume to cleanse His feet and not to mention His own biological mother! He has a truly unique place in his heart for women, but He also has special intentions for us in the world and in the family setting.

We are to submit to our husbands.

We are to be energetic, strong, and a hard worker.

We are to be busy and helpful to those in need.

We are to be fearless.

All of this is explicitly laid out by God in Proverbs 31.

We are not to be equal to our male counterparts. Jesus does not lay out the Proverbs 31 man, but He rather lays out the Proverbs 31 woman.

A husband or man is to be the head of the household as Christ is to the church.

A man is to love a woman so deeply that represents how he loves himself.

A man is to leave his father and mother.

Women and men are not equal in God's eyes, but they each represent Him in their own ways that the other needs.

If we were all equal, we would not need one another and therefore we would not need God. I am so thankful that we were not created equal. I am so thankful that God is so great that He could not just create only man or woman to represent His image. He is so perfect.

So, you see I am not a feminist, and it is OK.

It is acceptable for me to have this belief that God intended for men to lead women. It is also okay for people to have differing opinions. Writing this was not easy, but I know that not all people agree.

To feminists and those that are not, you are allowed to believe whatever you wish but have evidence to back it up.

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My Relationship With Religion Will Never Be Black And White

and that's okay!

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I was raised Christian let's get that out the way. Growing up in a small town I went to Awana (a children's church group Wednesday nights) and then once I was in middle school started youth group that night instead as well as a normal church on Sundays. If you would ask me from me being really young to probably around 15 I was all about church and building a relationship with God.

After leaving public school and growing my presence online and meeting so many people from all walks of life, I started questioning things.

Suddenly, I was immersed in this community with the best people who just loved everyone regardless of gender or sexuality or race and it was the place I was able to come to terms with something I had always repressed, my feelings towards girls.

I knew the moment I started talking to a girl named Laura that I had feelings for her I would normally have for a boy and because of the people I now had around me I just didn't suppress it. I identified online and eventually to family and friends as bisexual.

My questions started with wondering how my god this loving all knowing entity I had always known was un-accepting and promoted the exclusion of the LGBTQ+ community from the Christian faith. I knew that this community was full of the most loving and creative and beautiful people I have ever met and that was the start of me knowing my relationship with God would never be the same.

As I grew up and have become an activist for the things that mean a lot to me I have stopped attending church and have begun to see that I do not want any part in ANY religion that takes part in shunning anyone based on how they identify. I have been vocal about this to many people some more excepting then others but regardless I will never again take part in something that I myself am not 100% accepted within

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